Post Trauma
by petrichorial
Summary: When Raven is kidnapped, the fight to get her back is only the beginning, especially when her kidnapper becomes part of something bigger...much bigger. Robrae.
1. Severed Senses

The tower was quiet, bathed in a comfortable blanket of sleepy silence. Robin appreciated the peace; he only ever managed to work when his team members weren't acting like children. It was past midnight, the clock striking dull, rhythmic patterns against his eardrums as he scrolled through endless pages of encrypted files. The sound was almost as oppressive as what he had uncovered about the complete lack of efficacy within countrywide law enforcement. _This is what happens when heroes become commonplace. _Shaking his head, Robin hit the print button and leaned back in his chair, trying to think about what to do. People weren't his strength. Logistics, he could handle. Strategy. He knew how to pick a lock, how to diffuse a bomb. How to banish apathy from the minds of the people whose jobs he'd taken…that was a larger problem, and a potentially crippling one for innocent people. Robin ran an agitated hand through his hair and decided to turn his attention to solvable things for the time being. He would talk to the team about this one later – it was Starfire's territory, or maybe Cyborg's.

He was halfway through a thick file on prison breaks when the page in his hands flashed blood red in time with the lights that bathed the plexiglass walls around him. The siren broke the happy silence that had settled into the corners of the Tower and awoke its inhabitants, all of whom rose with varying levels of resentment and stumbled, half awake, into the living room. Raven was the first one there after Robin, having melted into the shadows of her wall as soon as the light flashing behind her eyelids had interrupted her meditation. Robin greeted her with a nod, noting the shadows around her eyes and her red-rimmed lashes.

"Still not sleeping?"

Raven gave him a brief glance, then lowered her gaze and raised her hood.

"No."

Raven had had trouble since Trigon had destroyed her home dimension. She hadn't spoken about seeing it in flames, not even to Robin, but he had managed to get a few words out of her immediately after Trigon's defeat. "I went to ask them for help," she had said. Robin had said something about how she hadn't needed it in the end, and she had smiled sadly, but said nothing more on the topic. Robin knew better than to press her, worried as he might be.

Raven sensed his concern and frowned slightly. There was nothing Robin hated more than a problem he couldn't solve. That was his main flaw…and his greatest strength, at least as a leader. Raven knew how to separate her job from her personal life, and she knew that her grief was something that time would have to heal on its own. That wouldn't stop him from trying to help though, a fact that had the irritating effect of warming her and annoying her simultaneously. Starfire was next in the room. Raven gave her a once over, wondering absently if there was some kind of Tamaranian trait that guaranteed perfect hair and a scent of strawberries. From what she'd seen of the planet, she doubted it. The alien leaned over the back of the couch to squint (like a model from a commercial for contact lenses) at the screen, on which an image was flickering.

"What is it?"

Robin had been scowling at the alert screen – as was his habit when something like this came up – and now bent down to type some incomprehensible coding into the master computer. The image wavered, then sharpened as Cyborg and Beast Boy entered the room, both looking less than awake. Robin gave them a brief once over.

"Get yourselves together, we've got a problem."

Raven felt a little sick as she looked at the screen through baleful, impassive eyes. An empty alley looked back at her, illuminated only by one flickering streetlamp. The damp pavement shone with spilled gasoline and broken glass and splashed across the wall facing the camera, written in something that looked suspiciously like blood, were the words: "_She dies if you can't save her first." _Cyborg swore under his breath, Beast Boy looked unusually somber, and Robin's scowl began to look like a permanent addition to his face. Starfire was halfway out the door before Robin gave the order, and Raven found herself remembering the alien's own experience as a hostage. Starfire had never given them more than snippets of that particular experience, but Raven sometimes got glimpses of emotions that were dark enough to make her shudder. She followed the rest of the team out the door, hovering about a foot off the ground as she hastily prepared her mind for combat. Her powers had been more volatile since Trigon. You would have thought that destroying her demon spawn of a father would have been cathartic, and it had been, but her personified emotions didn't seem to be able to separate his destruction with the destruction of Azarath, and they had an annoying tendency to run around in her mind, trespassing on each other's domains and tripping over invisible boundaries. It wasn't easy to regulate, but she put in the extra effort. She didn't want to lose control, didn't want to allow all her enemies to join Doctor Light in the world of eternal darkness she had trapped him in.

So she hung back as the others piled into Cyborg's pet car, followed Starfire through the night sky, kept track of her team via Robin's bright red – rather ostentatious, Raven thought – motorcycle. The streets were quiet, illuminated by the streetlamps that cast as much shadow as they did light. When they got to their destination, she melted easily into one such shadow, letting Robin know where she was with a light touch to his consciousness. He hated it when she did that; reminded him of his own temporary insanity. A natural consequence of saving someone from their demons was that you were forever associated with that horror. Raven felt a slight twinge of regret as she withdrew, feeling an echo of the irritation he tried to hide behind a slight nod and the steely determination that was so integral to his character. Raven preferred the shadows. She could watch this way; get an idea of the battle before it truly began. Robin liked this strategy too; Raven often functioned as a secret weapon, an additional fighting force that no enemy was prepared for. The rest of the team was less happy, mostly because it made them uneasy not knowing where she was. This time, though, there was no battle to watch. Nothing happened, and as the seconds ticked by, Raven's mind sounded a warning that it took her a while to puzzle out. Something was severed, some kind of sense that she couldn't put her finger on. She felt blinded though her eyes were still functioning, deaf though her ears picked up the slight buzz of the broken street lamp and the breathing of her teammates. By the time she realized what was wrong it was too late.

There was a hand over her mouth, a gun to her head, an arm wrapped tightly around her waist, heavy breathing in her ear. And she knew immediately what was wrong because people couldn't sneak up on her. Her connection with the emotional energy around her, the sense that she valued the most, was gone. She could no longer summon the dark energy that was her defense, no longer call objects to her with the small pieces of her own shadow, no longer escape out of her body in the raven that granted her mind a safe haven. It was as if her mind had been walled off, trapped in a net of something that pulsed a vague, electric blue. A choked scream threatened to escape her throat as she realized the implications of her entrapment, one that fell on deaf ears as she was dragged into a waiting car. The last thing she felt was the engine rumbling to life.

Robin knew something was wrong when Raven's presence disappeared like someone had switched off a light. Usually, they remained in very faint contact until she entered battle. Dislike the touch though he might, Robin took very real pleasure in being able to give orders without opening his mouth. Raven gave a unique dimension to the power of their fighting force, and the abrupt absence of her mental energy caught him off-guard until he noticed that the rest of his teammates were experiencing worse problems. Starfire had crashed unceremoniously to the ground and was moaning, which was uncharacteristic in and of itself. Her strength made falls like this less than harmless – if anything, the ground should have taken a beating. He had started towards her when a strangled cry made him turn sharply to watch Cyborg's lights shut off, leaving him twitching on the ground. Beast Boy reached Starfire's side, exceptionally pale, before he too collapsed, the lines of his skin trembling faintly as his pupils, illuminated in the light of the streetlamp, dilated rapidly. Robin, performing a quick assessment, decided that Starfire had the worst of it and knelt beside her, pulling out a medical scanner.

"Star? Stay with me, okay?"

She made a barely audible noise and lifted one arm, cradling it to her body. Robin winced as he saw the odd angle that her hand was bent at. Her voice was faint when she spoke, but a trace of her strength remained in the way she snapped the bone back into place, face contorted into a grimace that made her barely recognizable.

"I am not…permanently…damaged," she panted, pushing her hair away from a face that gleamed with sweat. Robin placed a hand on her shoulder and glanced around.

"Beast Boy?"

He shook his head, still shaking.

"I'm all right. Tried to transform. Got zapped."

Some of the pigmentation had come back into his face and his eyes had returned to normal, and Robin sighed in relief.

"And Cyborg turned off. What was that?"

Starfire, still holding one arm, was examining an ankle that was swelling rapidly.

"Someone has removed our powers. That is why you are not affected, Robin."

The sound of her voice alarmed him, laced with pain as it was.

"You need to lie down."

Improvising, he drew off his cloak and created a makeshift pillow, shoving Starfire gently back against the ground, whereupon she let out a sound that made him wince and closed her eyes. He glanced at Beast Boy, who looked equally concerned, and Cyborg, who hadn't regained consciousness.

"I never thought I'd be grateful not to have powers."

Beast Boy gave a laugh that wasn't really a laugh and stood up, somewhat shakily.

"What are we dealing with here?"

Robin shook his head.

"Anybody that can turn off powers at will has some kind of supertech, definitely. That's Cyborg's department…"

He looked uncertainly at the gleaming metal on the ground.

"He'll be okay, right?"

Beast Boy had started shaking again, but answered steadily enough.

"He'll be fine….hey!"

The transformation was slower than usual, and, Robin guessed from the expression on the monkey's face, painful. When Garfield emerged again, he raised an eyebrow and received a shadow of a grin in return.

"It's wearing off."

Sure enough, Cyborg's lights came back on and Starfire managed to pull herself to her feet, still massaging her sore limbs. It took a few minutes for everyone to return to normal, but it soon became evident that no lasting damage had been done. Except…except that Raven's presence was still conspicuously absent from his mind.

"Where's Raven?"

His voice was sharper than he intended, and his teammates were almost immediately as alarmed as he was. Cyborg touched the control panel on his arm, frowning.

"I can't get a lock on her signal."

Starfire had moved uncertainly toward the shadow that Raven had been enveloped in. Now, she stood up, the remains of a communicator and a jeweled belt held in her cupped hands. Robin swore violently and spoke through clenched teeth.

"Split up. Search the city. I don't want to see any of you again until we find some kind of clue."

But after a three hour-long search and a rendezvous at the same place she had disappeared, Robin was perilously close to panic.

"Okay, team. We need something and we need it now. What have we got?"

Their silence only increased the nausea that was shaking his composure. Resisting the urge to hit one of them, he turned and stalked toward his motorcycle, intending to tear the city apart, brick by brick. It was a half-articulated exclamation from Starfire that stopped him. When he looked at her, her hands were at her mouth, eyes wide with shock as she stared at the wall that was still dripping blood. A screen had opened up in the bricks. Robin found himself wondering how it had gotten their until he took a step closer and made out the image that was flickering balefully at them, interrupted by static.


	2. A New Adversary

Note: Thanks for the reviews and stuff! I'm glad people like it so far...will try and update regularly. :)

CW: Violence, blood

* * *

Raven was suspended from what looked like a factory ceiling, held by handcuffs that were chafing against her wrists, both of which were oozing blood. Bruising on her face showed that she had fought, but without powers…Robin knew immediately that whoever had kidnapped her had the device that worked so effectively. The only reason they were no longer under its influence was because it had gone with her, wherever she was. She was, alarmingly, unconscious, but an ominous slash in her leotard suggested that she had not succumbed willingly. He felt sick.

"We're going to find her. Ideas?"

His voice had taken on the razor sharp edge he knew made his team slightly afraid of him. It was the voice he had reverted to all too often while hunting Slade, the voice that wasn't quite his because he was at the edge of control, fighting not to lose focus. Cyborg's tracker had been up and running before Robin had a chance to tell him anything, even during the search, but the little screen had been blank. _He got her communicator. _It was the first thing anybody familiar with the Titans would have done, crushed their primary form of contact. He didn't allow himself a second look at Raven, but instead glanced at Starfire, who was studying the screen with unusual intensity.

"I believe I know where this is."

Robin glanced briefly at the image, but was unable to focus on anything but the blood that was slowly congealing on Raven's arms. Starfire had closed her eyes and was frowning in concentration.

"There is a factory near the river…Raven and I crashed into it when we had exchanged bodies."

Her accent had lost its lilting quality and now just sounded robotic, as if she too was struggling for control. Robin's fingers twitched towards a pocket on his belt, one where he kept his most deadly weapons.

"Do you remember where it is?"

Starfire's eyes were dangerous as she gave Raven's body one last glance.

"I do. We will rescue her, yes?"

Robin was reminded of how she had looked at their first meeting, how her eyes had blazed green like they were now, and had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep his voice level.

"Yes."

A small clearing of the throat behind him made him turn, scowling fiercely.

"Problem?"

Beast Boy folded his arms across his chest.

"Well I'm as down for being scary and determined as you guys, but I kinda have to point out the obvious."

He jabbed his thumb behind him.

"The three of us won't have any powers."

Difficult as it was, Robin shut down the part of his mind that wanted to punch anyone not willing to go charging after Raven and conceded the point.

"That is a problem. How good are you with hand to hand?"

Beast Boy grinned.

"Been training."

Robin tossed him a few of his less priceless gadgets, namely two explosive boomerangs and a grappling hook.

"Hope so. Star?"

She looked uncharacteristically grim as she responded.

"The people of my planet are taught from a young age what it means to fight. I will do well."

Robin glanced helplessly at Victor, who had a muscle jumping in his jaw.

"If you think I'm leaving her there while you go charging to the rescue…"

"We need you. Can't risk you being killed."

His words were even more blunt than usual, but this was no time for tact.

"Loss of their powers – " he gestured to Starfire and Beast Boy " – doesn't shut them off. And Raven's going to need medical help."

After a thirty second staring contest, during which Robin nearly backed down at the heat radiating from his teammate, Cyborg acquiesced.

"I guess I'll be damned if my pride hurts Raven."

But he was still nursing said pride when they pulled up to the factory and jumped out of the car, leaving him to his music, gadgets, and the tense anxiety that had coiled in his stomach. Robin didn't waste any time once they were there. When tracking down their enemies was easy, the fight that followed was inevitably difficult, and he wanted it over and done with. Raven was shut in a dark corner in his mind, walled off from his strategizing. The thought of her, the image, was a distraction, and one that might cost her life. His adopted father had learned that lesson the hard way twice over, and he had passed it on to Robin: never let the people you love interfere with your ability to save them. It was a lonely way of looking at things, but he was thankful for it now as the factory door was blasted off its hinges in a burst of green light.

Garfield and Starfire paused in the entrance, both paler than usual. Garfield in particular seemed to be struggling; Robin paused to give him an inquisitive glance. He shook his head.

"It's like being in an invisible straightjacket."

Starfire's eyes widened for a moment as she stiffened. Robin grasped her arm until she recovered, rubbing her arms to ward off the cold that she had only just become aware of.

"I am all right."

"You're no-ot!"

The sing-song voice coming out of the darkness was ordinary, affable even. The man himself was also ordinary, at least in appearance. He wore a plaid shirt tucked into jeans, his graying hair was combed into place, and the knife he held loosely in one hand was completely at odds with the bland expression on his face. Robin couldn't help but glance over the shoulder of his new adversary, but he immediately wished he hadn't. Raven, no longer unconscious, was watching him with eyes that had aged a hundred years in the past six hours. Not for the first time, Robin was grateful for the mask and looked away quickly, not wanting to betray the strange, sudden feeling in his chest. Normally, he came up with something witty to say, something to hide his nervous energy before each battle. But he didn't trust his voice. It was Starfire who spoke, and Robin could practically feel her fighting spirit, the little part of her that thoroughly enjoyed the barbarism on her home planet.

"Oh, I assure you, your device will not change my ability to pound you into the ground, human. If you doubt me, you are foolish indeed."

Robin, despite himself, felt a flash of amusement at the sharp contrast between her words and her soft, lyrical voice. Beast Boy was less compelling.

"What she said. That's our friend you've got chained up there. Nobody hurts my friends."

To his surprise, the man didn't attack. Instead, he lifted his knife, cupping it almost lovingly against Raven's stomach. It flashed dull silver in the meager light of the factory.

"Woah, woah woah. I don't want to fight anybody. Let's just think about this."

Raven didn't react to the knife pressed against her abdomen. Her unresponsiveness made Robin's stomach clench. His hand, which had been at his belt, froze as he cleared his throat.

"Release her."

His voice was tighter than usual, and even he could hear the menace in it. Raven's eyes flickered when she heard it. She shook her head, almost imperceptibly. Robin ignored her. The man looked sorrowful. Robin was reminded of an affable mechanic Bruce had hired once or twice.

"I don't think so. She's my bargaining chip."

And he drew the knife across her stomach. The slight intake of breath from Raven seemed as loud as a gunshot to Robin, who pointed his grappling hook at the man's head.

"Hurt her again and this goes straight through your skull. And it's not as clean as a bullet." He paused, readjusting his grip. "I'm going for the eyes."

The man lowered his gaze, expression mournful.

"This city needs purifying. And you would kill the one strong enough to do it. You people…can't you see what you're doing is wrong? Inviting evil that we never even dreamed of to show up at our doorsteps..."

Robin didn't move.

"Let her go."

The man pulled a gun out of his belt. As quietly as he could, Robin slipped a throwing dart into his free hand.

"You know, that's exactly what I said."

Robin glanced briefly at Beast Boy and Starfire, both of whom had taken advantage of the factory's shadowy backdrop. Slowly, inch by inch, they were gaining ground.

"What are you talking about?"

"My daughter, she was tortured to death. By some monstrosity created by Jump City's very own superheroes." His voice was mocking, then abruptly serious. "But that's okay. It showed me a greater purpose. Superheroes, especially the spawn of Satan," he paused to give Raven a look of fear and loathing, "Deserve to die the same slow and painful death that you bring on the good people you 'protect.'"

At the words 'spawn of Satan', a tear coursed down Raven's cheek, which only served to intensify the feeling Robin had that something was fighting its way out of his chest.

"I don't have any superpowers. Me as well?"

"You, son, you're just misguided. And now look what you're willing to do. Kill a man." He crossed himself. "Now lower your weapons and surrender, or she dies."

Robin allowed himself a brief glance at Beast Boy, who nodded grimly.

"Oh, I don't think it'll come to that."

In the space of thirty seconds, Beast Boy had grabbed the gun, Starfire had slammed him to the ground, and Robin was sprinting to Raven's side, hands shaking as he tackled her cuffs with a lock pick. She was in bad shape, and breathing too carefully. Robin suspected broken ribs. He winced as the gun went off behind him. He heard Star's labored breathing and what sounded like vitriolic cursing from the man behind him.

"Can you stand if I release you?"

He had managed to free one of her hands, but it meant that she was hanging from an already bloody wrist. Carefully, he wrapped an arm around her waist, wincing as she flinched.

"Doubt it."

Her voice, at least was normal. As predicted, she collapsed inward when he got the other cuff free, and he found himself taking most of her weight. Half kneeling, with Raven's arm draped over his shoulder and one hand at her waist, he looked at Star and Garfield, neither of whom were entirely all right themselves. The handyman lay at their feet, a lump rising bloodily on the back of his head. Robin couldn't bring himself to care whether he was dead or not.

"Find that device and destroy it. I've got to get Raven back to the tower."

She was easy enough to lift, but when they got back to the car, it was to find Cyborg unconscious in the driver's seat. Robin swore.

"Do you think you can handle a motorcycle ride?"

She wasn't speaking, which alarmed him almost more than her physical injuries, but the look she gave him answered his question.

"Just get my powers back."

Sensing the effort words cost her, Robin tightened his lips and yanked open the car door with a violence that was perhaps unnecessary. Once Raven had been settled into the passenger seat, he managed to wrench Cyborg out of his frozen position on the driver's side, shoving him unceremoniously into the back seat.

"Sorry man," Robin whispered before taking his place at the wheel. He stole a glance at Raven. She was pale, even for Raven, and he noticed that her lip was trickling a steady stream of blood down her face. He looked away, taking a slow breath that did nothing to negate his desire to run back into the factory and beat the man there to death. Reading his thoughts on his face, as usual, Raven smiled slightly.

"Wouldn't help anyone Robin."


	3. Tremors

Thanks for reviewing/favoriting/following! I know it's early, but positive responses make me really happy. :)

* * *

The hospital wing was as silent as the night that pressed against its windows. Figures occupied the three available beds, chests rose and fell in a smooth, silent rhythm, and monitors beeped and hummed against the otherwise oppressive quiet. Robin, who had been pacing the hallway for as long as he could stand it, was now propped up against the wall. His arms were folded tightly across his chest, his hands were curled into fists, and a muscle was jumping in his jaw. Normally, when he was this tense, he trained for hours on end. But tonight was not a normal night, and his feelings were more complicated than nervousness or anger. Guilt was tearing at his throat, guilt that he rarely considered. For Robin, the lives he saved outweighed the lives he ruined. Most of the time, it was enough to know that he was doing good in the world. Rarely did he consider the harm he did, the lives that he tore apart merely by virtue of his existence. With a sigh, he removed his mask and ran a hand over his eyes, which ached from tiredness. He had not slept, as the others were now doing. He had insisted on monitoring Beast Boy and Starfire when they had returned, supporting a still groggy Cyborg between them. All three were recovered, but Robin wanted to keep an eye on their DNA sequences all the same – it was the genetic material in some of their operons that had been attacked by the device. Certain mRNA had been disabled altogether, and though they were recovering quickly, Robin had still insisted on observing them overnight. All except Cyborg, who was more than capable of monitoring himself, and probably more qualified to do it than Robin. He had disappeared into his bedroom without a word, and Robin knew he would have to mend fences at some point.

His eyes, so disciplined until then, finally betrayed him as they strayed to Raven's still figure. She was hovering a foot above the bed, as usual, enveloped in a barely discernible glow. Robin was somewhat accustomed to her healing sessions; she sometimes levitated like this after a particularly strenuous fight, or even to heal a sprained ankle. Being somewhat accustomed, Robin knew that something was wrong. There were little things. Her hands, which rested at her sides, were trembling, fingertips moving like agitated winged things. Her eyelids were fluttering similarly, giving the impression that she was hovering somewhere just outside of sleep. For the thousandth time, Robin checked her monitors. Everything seemed normal. Her pulse was steady, her DNA had long since regulated, and her breathing was even, if shallow. Why then, was her face carved out of marble, as though she was not only awake but in pain?

Shaking his head, Robin placed one hand over the light switch on his way out of the room. If he stayed any longer, he would likely fall asleep somewhere on the floor, which would be the opposite of helpful.

The next morning was an odd one by everyone's standards. Raven, who had disappeared into her room sometime during the night, didn't make an appearance until after breakfast. Robin, who had apologized to Cyborg as soon as it was possible, was now turning over the broken pieces of the device that had done so much damage. He suspected he knew who it had been commissioned from, but there was a lot of hardware that had to be cross-referenced before he could be sure. Beast Boy was, as usual, fighting silently with Cyborg over the television remote and Starfire was doing push ups that involved standing on one hand and balancing her pet maggot, Silkie, on her feet. They all looked up when Raven entered the room, pausing just long enough to make their silent fight over who was going to speak first blindingly obvious. Raven looked at them appraisingly and raised an eyebrow.

"I'm fine."

Starfire, now balanced precariously on one hand, looked perturbed.

"But friend Raven, you were badly hurt and – "

"I'm _fine_," After a moment, she added, "Thank you."

Then she turned her back on them and put the kettle on. Robin turned back to the encrypted memory stick embedded in the heart of the mess of wires he was holding. Privately, he thought she was probably far from fine, but if he knew anything about Raven, it was when to leave her alone. She would come to him if she needed his help.

But she didn't. Two days passed, quiet ones, and Robin began to notice little things about her behavior that intensified his worry. She left the room when the television came on. She stayed at least a foot away from the rest of them, even in combat training. She avoided the gym. After a week, Robin began to exchange worried glances with Cyborg whenever she left the room abruptly or dropped whatever she was holding for no good reason. The following Monday, Robin made up his mind to talk to her, if only because he had lost a violent game of rock paper scissors in which Beast Boy had flatly refused to participate.

"You guys are crazy. No way am I knocking on her door."

And so it was Robin that stood apprehensively in front of the blank metal wall, behind which there was complete silence. He swallowed hard, lifted a hand, and knocked.

"Raven? There anything you want to talk about?"

There was no answer. Frowning, Robin turned away. That was odd. Raven spent all her free time in her room. If she wasn't there, then she was doing something she wanted nobody to know about. Not that they ever knew what she did in her room anyway. From his brief forays into the almost ostentatiously mysterious space, Robin knew that she spent a great deal of time immersed in the seemingly endless piles of books that were stacked rather precariously in their shelves. After he had checked the roof, the kitchen, and the hospital wing, he began to feel vaguely worried. Grasping at straws, he descended to the lower level of the tower, where the walls gleamed in metallic chrome and the sounds of machinery echoed back from Cyborg's garage. Running a hand through his hair, Robin took a left and scanned his fingerprint before entering the gym. He got a glimpse of the room; the usual austerity of the mats stacked in a corner, the scary looking machines that Beast Boy was so partial to using for his animal forms, the complex system of metal bars that latticed the ceiling where he himself practiced trapeze, and Raven. Her cape was thrown carelessly across a rack of dumbbells, her hair hung in damp knots around her face, and she looked like she was getting more of a beating than the bag she was attacking.

Cautiously, Robin cleared his throat, eyes focused on her bleeding knuckles. Her only response was a slight shake of her head, followed up by a punch that made him wince.

"You know that bag's meant for Cyborg, right?"

She paused for a moment, met his eyes, readjusted the bag, and hit it so hard that the air was suddenly riddled with series of sharp pops as her knuckles gave way.

"Okay, okay stop."

He didn't raise his voice, but he didn't have to. It was situations like this when Robin was grateful to be the leader of their little gang. Sometimes, his authority wasn't enough to stop this particular titan, but this time, she lowered her fists and pivoted to face him, breath coming in sharp gasps. She didn't try to stop him as he crossed the floor and reached for her hand, examining it as clinically as he was able.

"You broke your fingers."

She shrugged and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, leaving a smudge of blood on one cheekbone. Robin sighed.

"What's going on, Raven?"

He heard her mutter a few incomprehensible words, then had the slightly nauseating experience of watching someone's bones move back into place. Giving him a smile that was more of a grimace, Raven wiggled her fingers.

"Better."

Robin shook his head, a slight frown etched on his face as he tried to parse her expression.

"I'm serious. What – "

The alarm bell interrupted him and he broke of midsentence, shutting his eyes and shaking his head to clear it.

"We'll talk about this later. C'mon."

* * *

Hope you liked, and please let me know what I need to work on/fix/if I made a ton of stupid mistakes.


	4. Pseudo Security

Prison break anyone?

* * *

The moment he asked her to follow him, he had misgivings about it. He didn't trust her when she was like this. For that matter, he wouldn't trust anyone who had punched something until they bled, especially in a fight. But she was already out the door, and as he followed, Robin thought that there was no way this could end well. Their communicators were signaling a disturbance at the city jail. Robin felt a jolt of trepidation that had nothing to do with Raven. They only ever got calls when high security prisoners were becoming an issue, and that was never a good sign. Raven beat them all there, but gave Robin a slightly apologetic glance as he pulled up, motorcycle screeching against the pavement. She seemed embarrassed. He gave her a 'we'll talk later' look that he hoped didn't seem harsh. She responded with a brief nod. He couldn't help noticing that she did not extend her consciousness, as she normally did when they were about to enter battle. He guessed that she did not want to let him sense the color of her emotional climate.

Cyborg's car pulled up with a harsh squeal just then, and as they entered the prison together, they were greeted by a panicked guard. He was as grey as the rest of this place, Raven thought grimly. Brick walls, painted a not-quite-white color, extended all the way down the hall, which branched in two directions after the security desk. Their feet echoed on the linoleum floors, especially those of the small, sweaty man with the gun. He greeted them with a lot of gesturing.

"We've got a break-in."

Raven raised an eyebrow, and Robin frowned.

"Break…in?"

Starfire folded her arms across her chest.

"Do humans ordinarily break into prisons? Surely they want to escape, yes?"

Robin was scowling.

"Not if they need something…or someone. Come on."

He led the way through the labyrinthine halls, ignoring inmates who spat at their feet and guards who looked at them sullenly, resentful of the necessity of their interference. As they got closer to the east wing, ominous noises began to echo, shouts bouncing dizzyingly off the walls. Raven felt rather than heard guards being smashed into the concrete floor and winced as she sped up. The rest of the team followed suit so that when they got to the source of the disturbance, it was at a sprint. Cyborg, who had been furthest ahead, ducked as a guard went sailing past them and hit the opposite wall with a nasty crunch. Raven hastily placed one glowing hand against the man's temple to prevent the life from being sucked out of him and looked at Robin for orders.

He had shot his grappling hook into the ceiling the moment he knew what they were looking at and was now suspended over the scene like some strange bird of prey. The guards that were still standing lined the hallway on either side, shooting useless bullets at the stream of robots that had broken through the walls and were throwing people mercilessly around. Starfire, Cyborg, and Beast Boy were already fighting them while Raven tended to the injured guards as best she could. Rubble and dust clouded the air, lending a dream-like quality to the scene. He shook his head slightly, puzzled, and Raven sent him a questioning glance as she blasted a robot out of the way. That was what was puzzling him. The robots weren't made well – they were bulky and inelegant, their makeshift weaponry lacking in force and accuracy.

He dropped to the ground beside a guard, who whipped around to face him, gun drawn. He lifted his hands to chest height.

"Woah, hey, here to help."

She lowered her weapon, but her face, high cheek-boned and cold, did not change.

"What can I do for you? We're kind of in the middle of something here."

He frowned slightly.

"Right. Got that. What are they after?"

She shrugged.

"They're trying to get into the high security area. My guess, some guy flew over the cuckoo's nest again. Wants a mass breakout, to destroy the superheroes, gain control over the city, same story."

Robin ran a hand over his forehead, struggling to see from her perspective.

"You've had a lot of these lately, huh?"

He couldn't read her expression, but her body language radiated anger.

"The city gives most of our funding to your fancy gadgets. Bad guys know we don't have a prison they can't get into."

He bit the inside of his lip, feeling guilt bubble up in his chest again.

"Sorry."

She shrugged again, and he pulled a frustrated fist through his hair.

"Look, seriously, I'm trying to fix it, but can you just help me for a second? Can you tell me about any new inmates around here? The non-high security kind?"

Her eyes fixed at a point just over his shoulder, and before he could react, she had fired two shots into the metal arm that had been reaching for him.

"There are a couple on drug possession, some super hacker type, and a thug with a gun in for robbing convenience stores. They're still in holding cells up front."

Robin, heart still beating far too hard in his chest, gripped her shoulder briefly.

"Thanks. You and your guys should probably get out of here."

She raised an eyebrow.

"Just because you do my job better doesn't mean I don't still have to do it."

He shook his head, half in frustration, half in admiration, then took off at a run, pulling out his communicator.

"I don't think this is the main event, team. Starfire, come with me. Cyborg, Beast Boy, Raven, see what you can do about the robots."

He heard their assent in his ear, along with the unmistakable sounds of battle. Starfire caught up with him quickly. Her leggings were ripped and her hair singed, but she was otherwise unhurt.

"Robin, what is going on?"

He winced as the sound of an explosion followed them down the narrow hallway and the floor under his feet shook.

"Those robots are pathetic. Nobody thought they could stage a mass breakout with them. They're after better technology…or someone who can make it."

"So someone _is _breaking out of jail?"

"My guess is the inmate doesn't have anything to do with it. Somebody wants to recruit him, and it can't be for anything good if they're breaking into a jail to do it."

They rounded a corner and found themselves at the front of the prison again, where the smell of fresh paint was overwhelming and the same panicked guard as before was looking at security footage. Robin grabbed him by the collar and slammed him into the wall.

"Who paid you and where are they?"

The man looked at him defiantly, rather like an eight year old who was refusing to admit stealing from a grocery store.

"Nobody had to pay me for anything. But if you're looking for the guy who was after Hugh, you're too late. He's long gone."

Robin swore, but Starfire had hopped over the counter and was looking at the security footage.

"He is lying, Robin. They are in cell 365."

It was the little guard's turn to swear, and Robin recoiled as the man spit in his face.

"Fuck you too."

He dumped the guy on the floor and followed Starfire down the hall. When they burst into the cell, it was to find a weedy looking man in glasses sitting on his cot. There was no sign of another soul.

"Wow, I'm a popular guy today."

Robin ignored this.

"Starfire, go after him. He can't have gone far."

He heard her take to the air behind him. Once she was out of the room, he turned to the hacker, who was apparently called Hugh.

"Why didn't you go with him?"  
The guy rolled his eyes.

"I steal money. I care about money. This guy wasn't offering me any. Just gave some pseudo-inspirational speech about cleansing souls and gaining vengeance."

"What did he want?"

"Weaponry. Heavy-duty stuff. He showed me some electric thing he got from another new prisoner. It was advanced fuckery, but he didn't understand it for shit. Wanted me to duplicate the design and add to it. Said it was for the boss."

Robin scowled. This was more complicated than he liked. Complicated meant smart. Smart meant dangerous, and probably ambitious.

"What other prisoner?"

He examined his fingernails.

"Don't suppose you have any money."

"No."

"How come superheroes never carry cash on them? It's like you all are used to everybody just giving you everything."

Robin gave an exaggerated sigh.

"Right. Yeah. We have it so fucking easy with our government money. We just sit up in our tower with our feet up, and don't in any way risk our lives every fucking day. I'm so tired of this shit."

He received a grin in return for his diatribe.

"Dude was looking to collect from all the prisoners. He wasn't the only one either."

"How many were there?"

"I don't know. At least two dudes, plus some chick who was in charge. All of them kept talking about their boss."

"Which prisoners did he contact?"

"I don't know. My guy got his device from the crazy dude down the hall. Kinda old. Looks like a librarian…or like a handyman or something. He's still here, but he was happy to hand over all the tech he had."

The silence that fell was like broken glass, and Robin felt his blood go cold, as if he was back in the warehouse again, watching Raven's blood pool on the floor.

* * *

Thanks for reading! R&amp;Rs always helpful. x


	5. Supervillain With Your Coffee?

Kind of a slowish chapter for tonight, but ya know, it has to happen sometimes

As requested, more paragraph breaks ;)

* * *

Light crept over the edge of the horizon far too soon for Robin's liking. Grumbling under his breath, he shoved ineffectually at the pile of papers under which he had fallen asleep. They cascaded to the floor, but he ignored the mess as he stood up and crossed to the window, blinking at the brightness. Vaguely, he heard morning sounds from the city; car horns, seagulls shrieking, construction beginning. He pressed both hands over his face, trying in vain to blink away the tiredness that had bled into him, fuelled by a combination of lack of sleep and constant stress.

He turned his head slightly as a cup of coffee floated into his periphery. Raven blinked slowly at him as he took the mug in both hands and turned to face her. She was wearing a baggy sweater over a pair of black jeans and her hair was pulled away from her face. He was suddenly reminded that he had fallen asleep in a mismatched combination of uniform and casual clothes; he was wearing his mask with jeans and an old flannel shirt, with one boot still on. Raven raised an eyebrow as he tugged his mask off, her way of showing amusement.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome. Did you sleep on the couch?"

He ran a hand through his hair.

"Not on purpose. I was trying to figure out some leads on our prison break and fell asleep in the middle of a forensics report."  
She sipped the herbal tea to which she was partial and followed him into the kitchen, where they both perched on the stools that lined the counters.

"Any luck?"

He reached for an apple and shook his head.

"This guy is collecting technology from all over. Turns out this prison break wasn't the only one; just the only one we got called in on. The others were subdued so fast nobody thought to report them to us…every time, someone got in, interviewed some supergenuis or crazy person, and got out."

Raven frowned.

"Sounds like whoever it is is building up for something."

"And I have no idea what, or when, or how close he is to…to whatever he wants. But you know what the most frustrating thing is?"

She summoned a croissant in a nexus of black energy and dipped it in her tea.

"I have a feeling you're going to tell me."

"Everybody this guy has talked to has just agreed to work with him. He hasn't kidnapped, tortured, or bribed anyone. He just asks…or his groupies ask…and they hand it over…it doesn't make any sense."

Raven didn't look surprised by this information.

"Makes perfect sense."

"How?"

"Think about it, Robin. Every bad guy that we've actually had a problem with has been a psychopath. They may not feel empathy, but they're master manipulators. Do you really think Slade _had _to coerce people by force? He kidnapped and tortured and whatnot for fun, not because he wasn't persuasive enough on his own. With Terra, he _was _persuasive enough on his own."

Robin digested this. She was right. As usual. Almost as an afterthought, Raven added,

"And stop assuming it's a guy."

Again, she was right. It was starting to get a little annoying.

"Huh. Well that's a night wasted. Next time I'll just ask you."

She smiled slightly.

"I'm not the most reliable of helpers."

He hopped off of his stool and pulled some eggs out of the fridge.

"That's a convenient segway," he kept his tone too-intentionally light as he melted some butter over low heat. "I was just wondering why you busted your hand open on Cyborg's favorite punching bag."

She gave him a smile that didn't reach her eyes.

"I knew you weren't going to let that go."

He turned around to face her, leaning against the counter. Whatever the expression on his face was, it made her drop her gaze.

"Don't look at me like that. I wasn't going to do anything stupid."

"Right, because breaking your fingers intentionally is anything but."

"Look, Robin. I've been lax in my training. I'm not as strong as the rest of you. Without my powers, I'm useless. And that's a problem. Especially if our enemies have a weapon that takes them away."

He could see her point.

"Okay, fine, but why didn't you just tell me about it in the first place? Why do you always have to go off on your own and hurt yourself?"

Her face took on the shuttered quality that Robin, and everyone else for that matter, was familiar with. He had opened his mouth to say something (he wasn't quite sure what) when Starfire and Beast Boy wandered into the kitchen, Beast Boy resting on her shoulder in kitten form.

Raven glanced at them, then turned her back on Robin. He sighed heavily and turned back to his eggs, trying unsuccessfully to push their unfinished conversation from his mind. Kitten-Beast Boy leapt delicately from Star's shoulder and onto the top of the fridge, where he sat, grooming and waiting for the kettle to boil. Starfire, having pulled some sort of Tamaranian goop from the fridge, sat across from Raven, who gave her a ghost of a smile.

"And how are you this morning, friend Raven?"

Raven sipped at her tea, wondering how to answer truthfully.

"I'm fine Starfire. How are you?"

Star smiled brightly.

"I am well, thank you. I did have the night terrors last night, but today, the sun is shining."

She looked tired, Raven noticed, and there was something weary beneath her five hundred kilowatt smile.

"What did you dream about?"

Starfire tapped her fingers nervously against the counter, leaving indents about an inch deep.

"Nothing of importance. I am merely having the…bad memories from my time in captivity."

Raven didn't speak at first, but tried to communicate through her eyes that she understood all too well what that was like. Except that her memories were still fresh, new and painful in a way that she doubted she would get over any time soon.

"Maybe you should meditate with me today. It might help."

Star smiled brightly with teeth that looked almost airbrushed.

"Thank you very much for that offer. I would like to utilize your calming skills."

Raven dipped her head in acknowledgement as Beast Boy joined them in human form, eyes still sleep-clouded and puffy. Starfire greeted him cheerfully and the conversation moved into lighter waters. Raven slipped gratefully back into her usual silence, half-wishing she was in uniform and could use the protective covering of her hood. None of them wore their uniforms all the time; it was impractical, and they did need to do laundry. Besides, a lot of the tight latex, while streamlined and useful in battle, was uncomfortable during the day.

Today, Beast Boy was dressed in his usual combination of a graphic t-shirt, hoodie, and jeans and Starfire was wearing leggings under a large, galaxy print sweatshirt. Not that the casual attire made Star look like any less beautiful; her reddish hair was piled into a bun on top of her head, and her makeup-less face glowed healthily. Raven could not say the same about herself; she didn't wear make up almost ever, but she was prone to dark circles under her eyes and doubted she would ever achieve the swimwear-yoga-model look that Star managed so effortlessly.

Beast Boy yawned loudly and stretched.

"All right, I'm going to get back to my x-box. She misses me."

Raven raised an eyebrow.

"She..?"

Garfield stood up and crossed his arms over his chest.

"The only lady in my life. We haven't had any quality time together since Wednesday. I can't let my skills get rusty."

Starfire looked confused.

"But the x-box is not alive…Beast Boy I am concerned that your mind may have been damaged in the fight yesterday?"

Cyborg, who had been looking at some mysterious blueprints over breakfast, laughed.

"We're all concerned Star, but little dude's brain was always questionable, let's be honest."

Beast Boy made a disgusting face in response, stretching his arms out in front of him like a zombie.

"Must…eat…brains…"

Starfire laughed and shoved him playfully away, sending him flying into the couch. Robin sighed and left the room.

"I'll be in my office."

* * *

Thanks so much for reviewing and everything. Seriously. I appreciate it so so much.


	6. The Talking Treatment

angstangstangst ;)

* * *

It was midafternoon by the time Robin finished researching the destroyed power-blocking device they had uncovered. Cyborg had seen the schematic before, and with his help, Robin had tracked it to the source; an old computer repair place on the edge of town. Robin had wanted to charge in right away, but the place was shut and they didn't have an address for the owner, so he had reluctantly agreed to wait until first light the next morning. Everyone in the prison had been interviewed, and security around their kidnapping friend had been doubled, but they knew about as much as they had already confessed. They had a few other leads, but nothing substantial, and Robin found himself full of the nervous energy that always took him over when there were too many unknowns in the equation.

He stood up and stretched, leaving his papers for the moment. His head ached from too much time staring at a computer screen and his muscles screamed to be used. Worry of a different sort was tugging at his mind as well, worry about a certain empath. Last he had seen her, Raven had been meditating with Starfire, an activity she sometimes pursued when she was in a less reclusive mood. When he wandered into Starfire's room, however, she was gone and Star was engaged in play with her pet worm, Silkie. She greeted him with a smile, unfolding her long limbs from the cross-legged position she had been engaged in.

"How are you, friend Robin?"

He smiled briefly, but knew that it didn't reach his eyes.

"Frustrated. We have next to nothing on the prison breaks."

She frowned, placing Silkie on her shoulder.

"Can I be of assistance?"

He shook his head.

"Not today, but thanks, Star. I'll need you tomorrow."

"That will be fine. I am eager to help however I can."

He nodded and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Seen Raven?"

Starfire looked slightly troubled, the corners of her mouth turning down just slightly.

"I have seen her, yes. She was most…strange."

Robin felt anxiety twisting at his gut.

"Strange how?"

"I do not know. We had finished meditating and the Beast Boy and Cyborg were playing a game…tag perhaps? Beast Boy hid behind us and Cyborg then tried to grab Beast Boy, but missed and grabbed Raven instead, and then they left the room and Raven…she said she had to go and train…but she seemed…wrong."

Robin sighed. He thought he knew something about what was going on, but with Raven it was always somewhat hard to guess. She was a wildcard, especially when it came to trauma.

"Thanks, Star. I'd better go find her."

As he suspected, Raven was in the gym and dressed in workout gear, but she wasn't punching anything. Instead, she was throwing dark blasts of energy at one of the reinforced walls. Her face was expressionless, but she was shaking and her powers were bleeding out from under her feet like shadows, dying the floor an inky black color.

Robin had seen this before, and was wary of approaching her without warning. Ordinarily she would have sensed him by now, but she hadn't acknowledged his presence and seemed completely focused on the cool dark of her blows. He moved slowly around the edge of the padded wall, trying to avoid startling her. One hesitant step forward followed the next until he was standing just a few feet away.

"Raven?"

In the next instant, something white hot, then unbearably cold, had struck him in the chest. He felt the ground disappear beneath his feet, then his back collided with the wall and he saw stars. The breath left his body, and for a moment, the absence felt permanent. Once he was on the floor, it took a moment for him to get his vision back; lights flashed dizzyingly in front of his eyes for several seconds before the room came into focus. Raven, having realized what she had done, dashed to his side, concern etched on her features.

"Robin? _Robin._"

After a moment, he unstuck his tongue from the roof of his mouth and coughed.

"Well that was…not pleasant…ow."

She put a hand on his shoulder, holding him in place as she enveloped the other hand with glowing energy.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know anyone would be down here. Where does it hurt?"

"Chest and back…and I think you gave me a concussion."

She looked anguished, an expression Robin wasn't used to seeing on her face. "Sorry. Here."

Her hands and eyes glowed briefly as she placed them over his injuries. He grimaced, but held still as she leeched the pain from his body. When she was finished, he stood up carefully and looked at her. It was hard to tell, but he thought her eyes were red-rimmed. She responded to his scrutiny with a step backward and a defensive look.

"I wasn't punching anything."

"You were still hurting yourself."

She shrugged and crossed her arms over her chest.

"That's my business."

He massaged his right wrist, which was still sore and tingling.

"Yeah, except that you're part of a team. If you're going to hurt us, it's our business too."

She was silent, but pulled the hood of her sweatshirt as if to simulate the covering she usually got from her cloak. Robin sighed.

"Look, Raven, I need to know what's going on. You can't do everything alone."

He took a few steps closer, trying in vain to capture her gaze.

"Do you ever mind your own business?"

"Not really."

He placed a hand on her shoulder, which was a mistake born of instinct…to anyone but Raven it would have been a harmless gesture. Cursing himself for forgetting that she wasn't Starfire or Beast Boy or Cyborg, Robin knew she was going to attack him before she even threw the first punch. Ready for it this time, Robin leapt over the stream of dark energy that followed her fist and rolled out of the way. Drawing a backup staff from his pocket, he dashed aside the dumb bells aimed at his head, flipped over the bench press that followed those, and tackled Raven, sending them both flying against the mats that padded the far wall. They sank to the ground side by side and out of breath.

She was really crying now, tears streaming down her face like little rivers, and Robin was uncharacteristically quiet, waiting for her. Eventually, she wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her sweatshirt and tilted her head back against the wall. Robin didn't look at her – she would have hated that – but gave her a gentle nudge with his elbow.

"You going to tell me what's going on now or are you going to attack me again?"

Raven didn't answer right away, and when she did, her voice was thick.

"I'm still mulling it over."

Robin wanted to put an arm around her shoulders. Instead, he got to his feet.

"Well while you think on that, I'm going to clean up some of the mess."

Raven flicked her wrist, enveloping everything in black just long enough to return the equipment gently to its place.

"Sorry."

He extended a hand and pulled her to her feet.

"I've seen worse." There was a pause. "You going to make me ask again?"

She ran her fingers through the black curtain of her hair, a gesture that was normally Robin's when he was troubled. When you were an empath, you picked things up accidentally. Raven usually exercised a lot of discipline to make sure she didn't adopt the nervous tics of all her teammates, but she had literally been inside Robin's head, and it was harder with him.

"I've been doing some research. Remember our handyman friend?"

Robin's stomach clenched as images flashed behind his eyes. Raven suspended from the ceiling, cuts on her stomach, bruises on her face. Raven's eyes, blank and glistening as the factory door blew off its hinges…he shut his own eyes briefly, trying to stay controlled, but his words still came out spit through clenched teeth.

"Of course I remember. You were…God, of course I remember."

She seemed mildly surprised at his vehemence, eyes deep as she looked at him, though her voice betrayed very little emotion.

"My spiritual energy has been unbalanced ever since. I guess normal people would call it PTSD. With my powers…it's more dangerous than that."

Robin digested this, berating himself for lack of tact. If it caused him this level of pain to remember seeing that night unfolding, he could only imagine how difficult it was for her, how painful those still-fresh memories were.

"Okay."

There were a hundred questions he wanted to ask, but couldn't think of how to do it. With that trick she had of picking up on his thoughts, Raven responded to what he left unsaid, or at least he thought she was going to.

"I don't know if I should be fighting, before you ask."

"That's…actually not what I was going to ask."

She raised an eyebrow and he relented.

"Okay, I was going to eventually, but that's not the main thing I'm worried about."

"I'll bite. What is?"

He shrugged, suddenly self-conscious as he found himself tasked with the impossible feat of putting into words the feelings that mostly made his stomach hurt.

"You've…been through a lot."

She sank onto a bench, resting her forearms on the top of her knees.

"It hasn't exactly been peaches and cream for any of us, Robin."

It was his turn to avoid her gaze, and so he didn't see that she was staring just as determinedly at a dumbbell as he was at the ceiling. Still quiet, he sat next to her.

"Yeah, but the others know when to ask for help. You just stew in whatever the hell it is until you decide to break your hands or…or get black out drunk or disappear into an alternate dimension."

He glanced over in time to see her wince and felt immediate remorse for throwing her past back in her face.

"I…sorry. All I mean is that the main thing I'm worried about is you ending up dead."

She knotted her fingers together and stared at them as though they had the answers to life's mysteries.

"I um…That's fair."

She cleared her throat.

"Robin, the reason I don't ask for help is because there isn't anything anybody can do. I have to deal with my crap on my own sometimes."

A familiar frustration rose in Robins chest as he watched her rub her hands slowly back and forth, running her knuckles against her fingertips.

"But not all the time. And it is, it's all the time with you. You decide that nobody can help you because you decide you're beyond help. And that's…that just makes it so much harder for you."

She pressed her lips together, looking more tired than Robin had seen her in a long time.

"Look, all I'm saying is that we can't give you what you need if you don't tell us when you're in pain."

"Starfire makes sad-eyes, Beast Boy makes jokes, and Cyborg makes metaphors about damaged car engines," she muttered, wiping her eyes on the back of her hand. Tentatively this time, Robin put a hand on her shoulder.

"Okay, fine, I mean me. If you don't tell me."

He gave her a squeeze, then stood up, reading her body language as best he could.

"I'll leave you alone now. Just…I'm not a therapist, but I kind of think you could use one. There's nothing shameful in helping yourself out."

He was silent, footsteps muffled by the mat beneath his feet, until the door slid open in front of him. There, he paused and glanced back at her tense figure, swallowing the urge to turn back and wrap his arms around her.

"I'll make it an order if I have to."

When the gym door shut behind him, Raven sat for a long while in the descending semi-darkness.

* * *

Hope you liked, thanks so much for reviewing, etc. etc. xxxx to all of you


	7. A Thing For Globes

Kinda fluffy. :)

* * *

Raven wasn't in the tower the next morning. Not in her room, not in the living space, and, thankfully, not in the gym. Robin found a note in his office after half an hour of worried searching that read, in Raven's spiky cursive:

_Stop freaking out. Be back later this afternoon._

He smiled a little in spite of himself and tore up the note, then went to go find Cyborg for a quick consultation on their mystery tech expert. The computer repair place was innocuous enough, but the man they found there was yet another service provider to jail-break-in-guy (they'd been calling him that for lack of a better name) who was prematurely warned of their arrival. He wasn't much of a fighter, but his explosives didn't provide the most fun Robin had ever had. When Raven returned close to sunset, he was swearing under his breath as he probed what felt like a dislocated shoulder.

She came in through the door for once, her usual teleportation discarded along with her uniform. She wore a sweatshirt, torn jeans, and combat boots. She raised an eyebrow when she saw him, but he detected concern behind her sardonic expression. He grimaced in return.

"We found computer geek."

Wordlessly, Raven crossed the room and pushed his hand away from his shoulder. He winced as her fingers found the injury.

"He was working for…oh _fuck_."

She had pressed down on his shoulder.

"Sorry."

She gave him an almost-sympathetic glance.

"I have to pop this back in before I can heal you."

She hadn't let go, and he tilted his chin toward the ceiling as pangs shot from his shoulder to his elbow.

"Sounds peachy."

She smiled briefly.

"I'll give you a countdown. One…"

There was a nasty crunch and a moment of blinding pain, then the too-familiar relief of Raven's healing energy. Having let out a yell, Robin got his breath back.

"That was mean."

"Hurts less when it takes you by surprise."

"Yeah, but you were also having a little sadistic fun, admit it."

Raven folded her arms across her chest, having finished her work.

"I am half demon."

He rolled his shoulder and followed her into the kitchen, imitating her voice under his breath.

"I'm half-demon, I like sarcasm and playing with people's bones la de fucking da..."

She ignored him, probably justifiably, and put the kettle on the stove. Robin detected a slight tremor in her hands. He leaned against the counter, still massaging his shoulder.

"Computer guy was working for the same mysterious recruiting guy we heard about at the jail. It's kind of like he's rallying people…like, leading a political movement or something."

Raven sighed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I don't do politics."

He rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, none of us do. That's why this whole superhero schtick works out for us."

As a sharp whistle rent the air, Raven poured a steaming mug of something that smelled like roses and pine needles, offering it to him silently. He wrapped his hand around the glass and waited while she prepared her own tea and settled herself against the opposite counter.

"That's probably why we're being targeted. People don't like feeling cut off from their protectors."

Robin ran a tired hand over his forehead.

"Yeah…yeah, that makes sense. God, we're doing more harm than good these days."

He told her about the problems with the police force he had uncovered. She sipped her tea.

"Problems like that are the ones we can't fix," she paused, then added bitterly "Take down all the villains you like, you still can't stop the police from shooting people left right and center."

Robin found himself remembering a particularly vivid conversation he'd had with his adopted father one afternoon. They had just finished training, and Robin remembered turning to leave when Bruce put a hand on his shoulder and asked him what he thought the nature of evil was. _I don't know…sometimes people just like to hurt other people. _Bruce shook his head and sighed. _If only it were that simple. The problem is, Robin, that evil exists in all of us. It's there. It's pervasive. And it's pervasive because people lie to themselves about it. They hurt the people they love most, tell themselves it was to protect them. They want power, they join the police force, they call themselves heroes. But there are no heroes. Just those of us who prevent suffering where we can. _Robin had stood, digesting this. Bruce gave his shoulder a squeeze. _It's a lot to take in. But if you're serious about this, if you want to help, you have to know. _He had stared out the window for a moment. _Even if there were heroes, they wouldn't come in the form of gun-carrying police officers._

"Bruce said something like that once."

Raven led the way to the couch, and he couldn't help but notice the way she sank into it as though exhausted by standing.

"Smart guy."

"He is, yeah."

He sighed as he placed his cup on the table in front of him.

"I just don't know how to deal with this one. It's never been this way before, it's always been cut and dry. Us versus them. Now it's like us versus propaganda."

"You'll figure it out. If all else fails, we know whoever this is will attack eventually."

Robin frowned, playing out strategy in his head. He hated waiting for someone else to attack him. It almost always put you at a disadvantage; you never knew what to expect from your enemy when the element of surprise was one of their tactics. Shaking his head, he glanced sideways at Raven, who was staring blankly into her mug.

"How was your day?"

She smiled tiredly.

"Not as exciting as yours."

He eyed her expression, her weary body language, her slightly bloodshot eyes.

"But clearly eventful."

She nodded, but refused to meet his eyes, staring instead into middle distance where the sun was setting over the waters that separated them from the rest of the city.

"I went to a therapist…like you asked."

Robin sometimes treated Raven as he would a shy animal or some sort of bird. No sudden movements, not even conversational ones. It annoyed him to no end sometimes, but it was usually the best approach to take with someone who had an almost pathological fear of talking about her feelings. Said fear probably made therapy a not-ideal situation for her, which explained a lot about her demeanor just now.

"Oh."

She laughed, but the sound had a biting quality.

"Yeah. Oh."

By instinct, Robin kept the tone light, putting his feet up on the table.

"Did you talk about your childhood? They _always _ask about your childhood."

She shot him a familiar faux-irritated glance at his mocking tone, but didn't join him in his sarcasm.

"You speak from experience."

He grimaced, but good-naturedly.

"I'm an orphan. The foster care system doesn't just let you traipse around without some serious counseling. First there are grief counselors, then trauma counselors, then psychologists, psychiatrists, the works."

Raven smiled a little.

"Sounds like a party."

"Oh, it was. Trust me, nothing like sterile rooms and expensive knick knacks to improve spiritual well-being."

"Mmmm. I wondered about the knick-knacks. This guy seems to have a thing for globes."

He drained the last of his tea and put the mug on the table, where it clicked hollowly.

"Globes aside, was he okay? Or did I just give you some really bad advice?"

She ran a hand through her hair, still refusing to look directly at him.

"He was fine. I, clearly, am not."

"Ah."

"I believe his exact words were 'Well, Raven, it seems we have some work to do'"

He made a sympathetic face, trying to read her expression without being blindingly obvious. He didn't quite succeed, but Raven didn't seem to take offense. Instead, she blinked slowly at him and stood up.

"I'll be all right. If this is going to be a weekly thing, I might as well get used to it now."

She left the room, again without her usual hovering.

"Good night, Robin."

"Yeah," he muttered "Good night."

* * *

Thanks so much for the recent in-depth reviews! I'm so glad you guys find the characters believable; I work really hard at that. xxxx times infinity.


	8. Risk Aversion

Raven opened one eye, then immediately narrowed it in irritation.

"What do you want, Starfire?"

Long red hair swung in her periphery and the scent of strawberries drifted through the evening air.

"I was merely wondering if you are joining us for dinner."

It was nearly six o' clock, and the sun was setting over the city skyline. The roof was empty, save for Raven's cross-legged form and a mismatched assortment of décor, remnants of the various aesthetic ventures of the Titans. She sat on a woven rug, the only thing she had ever brought to the roof. Beast Boy, then in the process of building the 'most relaxing place ever' had been crushed to discover that she was just trying to get rid of an unwanted gift from an ex-boyfriend. _You meet a guy in a club, you talk about darkness for a few hours, and he thinks it's the most meaningful thing in the world. I mean, seriously, Garfield, do you want this thing? _He had draped it over the side of an absurdly horizontal lawn chair.

"I don't think so, Star. Thanks."

She heard echoing footsteps, then hesitation. A sigh served to calm the brief flare of annoyance, but her voice still came out sharp.

"What?"

"I…was curious about what happened between you and Robin."

She opened both eyes this time, frowning.

"What are you talking about?"

Starfire stood in front of her, a few feet away, and looking deeply troubled.

"He has been strange lately. He will not tell me where you were yesterday and has denied ever finding you in the gymnasium, but I heard banging and I know you were fighting…what has happened?"

Raven felt a sudden rush of gratitude towards Robin, and at the same time, a feeling of deep embarrassment. Thankful at her ability to keep her face expressionless, she got to her feet, choosing her words carefully. Starfire was a friend, but Raven was not an oversharer. Not, apparently, unless it was Robin she was talking to.

"Star…there are no problems between Robin and I. The problems are mine."

Starfire's face cleared a little; she could understand better Robin hiding something for the sake of a teammate.

"Oh. I see. Is there…anything you need?"

Raven's embarrassment deepened. It took all of her focus to avoid the defensiveness to which she was prone.

"No. Thank you. But no."

She didn't get a moment alone with Robin until midafternoon the next day. He planned to train his team ruthlessly, a habit that was very characteristic of Robin: when in doubt, train. He was still working night and day on identifying his mastermind recruitment guy, but Raven could tell by his moods early in the morning that he hadn't had much luck. She ran into him on her way to the roof, where she had been spending most of her time lately – and it hadn't escaped notice. He raised his eyebrows as she grazed his elbow.

"The roof again?"

Raven pivoted to face him, folding her arms across her chest.

"So?"

He sighed.

"So, nothing, I guess. I just haven't seen you for a couple of days."

"Yeah, about that," she fiddled with one of her rings, avoiding his eyes. "Thanks for not spilling my secrets."

His face softened slightly, but Raven could still see something in his eyes that meant he wasn't getting something he wanted.

"You don't have to thank me for that. You know I would never – "

"Yeah, but thanks anyway."

Robin, as he looked more closely, saw dark circles under her eyes and a certain familiar weariness in the way she held herself. She looked as if she were carrying something around with her that was draining her energy. Several things occurred to him that he could have said or done just then. The two vying for his attention were a hug or a hand on the shoulder. Shaking off his impulses, Robin managed to answer somewhat normally.

"Anytime."

She dipped her head slightly and turned to go.

"Hey, Raven? Group training tonight."

She felt the suddenly-ubiquitous knot in her chest tighten.

"Oh. Right. Yeah."

Group training sounded about like the least fun thing she could imagine at the moment, especially since it had barely taken a touch from Cyborg to send her off the rails. Her fight or flight response was somewhat overactive at the best of times, and now, with whatever was going on in her brain, she was worried.

"Do you need to skip it?"

Mentally cursing for letting any of her reaction show on her face, Raven shook her head.

"I'll be there."

She was there, melting silently through the wall of the tower and into the improvised training course that had taken over the gym. She swept a practiced eye over their obstacles, looking for the familiar handiwork of her teammates. They took turns setting the traps and preparing the gym. Things stayed fresh that way, and the simulation was closer to a real battle than it would have been otherwise.

This week was Robin's. Raven recognized a few trip wires, some explosives, and something in the floor that looked suspiciously like a pit ready to open beneath them. Robin himself was standing on the other side of the room, wearing what looked like Slade's old mask and a red and black costume vaguely reminiscent of X's.

She looked sideways at her other teammates. Starfire looked excited, as per usual. These training sessions were rarely a challenge for her, but she still enjoyed them. Cyborg had his competitive face on; he and Robin had a friendly rivalry at all times, but it piqued during training sessions. Beast Boy looked somewhat nervous. Had Raven not been too preoccupied with her own adrenaline-inducing nerves, she would have realized how much Garfield hated to disappoint his team leader. As it was, she noted his expression somewhere in the part of her brain not actively trying to quell the nausea in her stomach.

"Ahahaha! I am the evil…somethingorother! You will never destroy me!"

Robin's voice was full of suppressed mirth, but Raven knew how closely he was watching them – her in particular. Cyborg was the first to attack. As Raven and Starfire both took to the skies to avoid the trip wires, he handily, if messily, aimed his cannon at explosives. Within seconds, they had all fizzled benignly to death. He had been refining the weapon's capacity. Raven noted, not without appreciation, the improvement in aim and finesse he had wrought.

Just above her, Starfire let out a shriek, and Raven's heart jumped to her chest before she realized that Robin had aimed a boomerang at the pair of them, one that had exploded into a hundred tiny darts, no doubt electrified. Pulling up short and praying to several gods that she didn't believe in, Raven sent shadows carefully up in front of them to disengage the tiny barbs that were hell-bent on attaching themselves to their suits. With a flick of her wrist, she sent them hurtling back at Robin, who was forced to crouch and defend himself while she grasped Starfire's arm to keep her from plummeting to the ground, hair still smoking from the shock.

Below, Beast Boy tripped an unfortunate wire, causing the padded mats to give way; in their place were several beds of spikes. From their structure, Raven guessed that they were electrified too. Garfield was quick to transform; an eagle, then a monkey, then a smaller lemur, who hung from the trapeze on the ceiling and scampered towards Robin. Distracted by Beast Boy's rapid advance, Robin was too slow to avoid Cyborg's more physical confrontation; he had gained the other side of the room and was attacking with a lot of hand-to-hand. Starfire, having recovered quickly, hurtled forward like a bullet, eyes glowing, and Raven followed. All four of them closed in on Robin, who flashed a quick grin before flipping a switch at his belt. The force field was sudden and violent. Raven found herself being tossed through the air, barely managing to catch herself before encountering the spikes that were still visible through the floor.

* * *

Sorrynotsorry for semi-cliff hanger ;)

Thank you for reading + rates and reviews always v. helpful!


	9. Panic

A longish one for tonight :)

* * *

The electric pulse of the force field didn't last long enough to do any damage, but the titans scattered, giving Robin time to leap to the trapeze. Starfire was in the air again in a second, but Beast Boy hadn't quite avoided the spikes, and Raven sensed pain in his emotional climate before he ascended in bird form to the trapeze, dripping blood from a stab wound on his calf. She managed to catch herself, but barely. The initial shock gone, she ascended shakily, but her heart rate refused to slow, palms sweaty as she felt panic grow in her chest.

While Star attacked, severing the trapeze ropes with concentrated beams of green, Raven tried to gather herself. Her heart was racing, her hands were shaking, and blackness was bleeding from her feet. She couldn't convince her body that it wasn't in imminent danger. Wounds that had closed weeks ago felt fresh, suddenly, and she could practically feel cold steel against her stomach. This was exactly what she had been afraid of. However 'perfectly natural' her therapist said it was, episodes like this were less than helpful in training and could be disastrous in battle.

Not noticing her distress, Robin sent another boomerang whistling towards her. Normally, deflecting it would have been simple, but Raven's hands were shaking so badly that her nexus of black energy missed the boomerang completely and instead shot by Beastboy's head. He gave her a reproachful glance.

"Hey, watch it!"

She couldn't apologize, she could barely keep darkness from racing out of her and enveloping everything in sight. Robin's eyes found hers. She didn't know what she communicated, but he frowned and dropped from the trapeze, purposely allowing Star to catch him midair and bind his hands in his own cloak while Beastboy leapt into the air and wrapped monkey hands around his head. As soon as they hit the ground in a tangled mess, Cyborg placed his arm canon against their leader's head.

"Boo yah!"

Grateful for the out, Raven waited until her team mates had landed and commenced their high-fiving and excited chatter about strategy, then melted through the floor. Unruly as her powers were at the moment, even her teleportation was off, and she found herself half crouched in a tower hallway just off the kitchen, knuckles of her fists pressed into the soft carpeting of the floor, breath coming in ragged gasps. It must have been several minutes, but it seemed like no time at all before she heard rushed footsteps. Robin was in front of her before she could even think about escaping into her room, kneeling insistently in her periphery.

"Raven?"

She did not look at him, mostly because she was worried that if she did, she would attack. He did not listen to her nonverbal communication, every inch of her that was screaming for him to go.

"You're okay. All right? You're fine, it's just practice."

She felt shadows leaking from her clenched fists, focused on pulling them back into her body.

"Raven. Breathe."

Shakily, she obeyed, feeling sweat on her brow.

"Good. You're doing great. Keep breathing."

She knew she was regaining her faculties because she began to feel the urge to cuff Robin around the head, and also the beginnings of embarrassment. Slowly, the void she had been carving into the carpet receded.

"There you go. You're safe, okay? Everything is fine."

She didn't move immediately; she was afraid to. The feeling in her limbs was reminiscent of the tingling that accompanies decreased blood flow. Her legs felt breakable. Her entire being felt breakable. Still, Robin refused to leave.

"You need to get up."

Dimly, she realized that he wanted to get her out of sight before the other Titans showed up.  
"You can. I promise. Come on."

He grasped her elbow and pulled her to her feet, where she swayed for a second, surprised that her legs were willing to hold her. She heard footsteps and voices in the kitchen. Robin glanced down the hall, then at her, gaze too probing for Raven's liking.

"My office."

He kept a hand clasped around her forearm, as if worried she was going to topple over. Ordinarily, Raven would have hit him, but she had a similar worry. Robin's office was small, but impeccably organized. He didn't allow any hint of his personality into this space; it was all austere filing cabinets and computer screens. There were two chairs pushed against the back wall, next to a bookshelf composed oxymoronically of stainless steel and carved wood. Raven collapsed into one of them while Robin sank slowly into the other. They looked at each other for a moment, or rather, Raven examined his lower jaw while he looked expectantly into her face, reaching up to remove his mask.

"I'm sorry."

He was taken aback by that. Of all the things he had been expecting her to say or do, that was the last one he would have guessed.

"For what?"

She wove her fingers together and cracked her knuckles, the air suddenly riddled with sharp pops. Robin winced, reminded of the punching bag incident.

"For being a liability. If I'm this useless in practice, imagine how much worse it'll be when we're dealing with the real thing."

The thought had crossed his mind.

"It's not something you should be sorry for."

"I thought I could handle it. I miscalculated."

There was silence then, the kind that settles in corners and makes air feel viscous.

"You still don't have to be sorry. You just have to fix it."

"And if it can't be fixed?"

He smiled slightly.

"Of course it can be fixed."

"Blind optimism again."

He rolled his eyes.

"Maybe I just have confidence in you."

"Same thing."

She was being difficult on purpose, partially out of embarrassment, partially because she liked to push his buttons.

"Can we stop with this self-deprecating crap, just for a second?"

He ran his hands through his hair, then leaned forward, embarrassing her with the sincerity in his gaze.

"You're worth it, okay? I know you can get through this."

She stood up abruptly, cape swirling around her ankles.

"Maybe. But I still need training. And apparently, I can't even deal with an obstacle course."

Her voice was its usual low-pitched monotone, but Robin thought he detected frustration in her body language, the way she paced back and forth, not seeming to notice the shadows that bled from under her feet.

"I could train you."

She froze.

"You…could?"

He folded his arms across his chest and leaned back in his chair, raising an irritating eyebrow to compensate for the annoying urge to pull her into his arms.

"You need hand-to-hand training. I'm pretty experienced in that area."

After a brief and sardonic acknowledgement of his inflated ego, she turned her back on him and pulled her hood over her head.

"Thank you. That would be...kind…of you."

She sighed.

"I'd better go explain things."

He winced and watched her go, not envying her the task. Raven closed the door carefully behind her, feeling an odd mixture of emotions. Embarrassment was predominant among them, but gratitude was there too, along with something she recognized as…fondness. _Shit. _Fondness was the last thing she needed right now. Trying in vain to shake the unsettled feeling in her stomach, she moved down the hall, footsteps echoing as she left the carpet and came to the stairs that led down into the living area, where she paused to force a deep breath in and out of her lungs.

Beast Boy spotted her first and paused his video game long enough to yell to her over the back of the couch. Raven noticed a long bandage wrapped around his leg.

"Hey Raven! How come you didn't stick around?"

Starfire, who had been watching the game tasked with the uncomfortable role of referee, turned around to face her, leaning against the back of the couch.

"Yes, friend, I wished to congratulate you on your performance! We worked very well together!"

Cyborg, more perceptive than the other two, put his remote down and approached her slowly.

"Anything you wanna talk about?"

She sighed and lowered her hood.

"I won't be doing any more group training. Not right now, anyway."

Starfire and Cyborg were silent, but Beast Boy popped briefly into a frog and back again.

"What?! Why not, Rae, you kick serious butt!"

Cyborg had been giving her a long look, from which Raven surmised that he had been at least as worried as Robin lately.

"She doesn't have to tell us if she doesn't want to, B."

"But – "

"I _said _she doesn't have to tell us. Now let's you and me sit down so I can finish kicking _your_ serious butt."

Raven shot him a grateful glance, but still felt that she owed them some kind of an explanation. They were her friends, after all. As if echoing her thoughts, Starfire had flown to her side and was now prodding various limbs.

"Perhaps you require some Tamaranian acupressure? Or neftrous glorg brains? Or some form of human medication?"

Peeling her off and holding her by the shoulders at arms length, Raven looked over at Beast Boy, who was frowning.

"Thanks Star, but it's not that kind of a problem. My powers…have been unpredictable lately. I can't risk hurting one of you by mistake."

Beast Boy and Cyborg exchanged glances as Starfire bit her lip, a sorrowful cast entering her expression.

"This has to do with your imprisonment, yes?"

Raven took a deep breath, willing herself not to cry. The desire to do so was sudden, unpredictable, and rooted in her exhaustion, which weighed on every limb.

"I…yes."

Cyborg, still standing, placed a metal hand on her shoulder.

"Hey, that's all right. There are other ways of training."

Starfire, still looking as though her pet maggot had died, wrapped her in a bone crushing hug, which only increased the feeling that something was fighting to get out of her chest. As the corners of her eyes began to prick, Raven was suddenly grateful for her hood.

"This is the all right, friend Raven! You are still our friend and team mate in sickness and in health!"

Beast Boy, who had vaulted over the back of the couch, was looking unusually somber.

"Uh…Star, I'm pretty sure that's for weddings."

His gaze shifted to meet Raven's as he rubbed the back of his neck with one hand.

"But she's right, you know. We're here for you, whatever."

Raven couldn't do much more than nod; she didn't trust her voice or throat, which felt even more constricted. Beast Boy glanced cautiously at her after a quick squeeze to her shoulder.

"I'm guessing you want to be left alone now."

With difficulty, Cyborg peeled Starfire away from her, pushing the alien princess towards the sofa.

"We gotcha, ice princess. C'mon, BB, let's see how many more times I can cream you."

With another long glance at Raven, Beast Boy backed away.

"Yeah. Okay."

Not trusting her powers, Raven made her way on foot towards the hallway. By the time she gained the relative safety of the carpeted floors and insulated walls, tears were streaming freely down her face. Every bone in her body ached and her mind was plagued with memories of pain, darkness and doubt. On top of all of that, she hadn't had a good night's sleep in days and her entire being craved the warm comfort of her bed.

Robin closed his office door behind him, glancing left and right down the hallway before taking a right turn toward the main hall, idly wondering if Raven needed rescuing from the sometimes-overzealous members of their team. He had reached the juncture where his little alcove met the main corridor when he heard her footsteps. She moved by him quickly, looking determinedly at the ground. He caught a glimpse of her face and winced. Ordinarily, Raven would have sensed him, but she was exercising a great deal of discipline to keep her powers in check and had not engaged her usual empathic field. Robin took a hesitant step forward, but thought the better of it and let her go. The sound of her bedroom door slamming echoed through the quiet of the tower. In the silence that followed, Robin leaned his suddenly aching head against the wall and wished that he could help her more.

* * *

Thank you soooo much for reviewing and stuff! Makes my day(s).

xxxxx


	10. Robot Psychology

To compensate for lack of action ;)

* * *

"I want an alert put out all over the city, and I want it to happen _now._"

Robin swore as he slammed the phone back into it cradle, perhaps more violently than was necessary. Cyborg paused, one blowtorch finger suspended over a blown circuit in the T-car's keys.

"What's going on, man?"

Smashing his hand into the alarm button on the side of the wall, Robin stalked furiously toward the master computer built into their TV screen.

"Remember the guy that kidnapped Raven, tortured her, and commissioned a power-neutralizing device from a mad scientist who tried to blow us up when we raided his store?"

"Well when you put it like that, how could I forget?"

Robin snapped his mask over his eyes and began to type vehemently at a keyboard that was close to the size of the sofa.

"He got out of jail."

Starfire frowned over his shoulder, the scent of strawberries drifting from her hair.

"But how? And where is he going?"

Robin scowled.

"My best guess? To join our favorite new mastermind."

He glanced over his shoulder at his now-assembled team.

"He's headed east. Traffic light caught him at 24th and Pine."

Beast Boy was halfway out the door when he paused and glanced around the otherwise empty living room.

"Uh…dude? Where's Raven?"

Robin's masked face was impassive.

"I don't know," he lied. "But we don't have time to wait around. Come on."

Raven frowned, hand tightening around her blinking communicator. There was no message accompanying the beeping, but it still sounded insistently through the spacious room in which she was seated.

"Turn it off."

"People could be in danger – "

"The city can do without you for one hour. You know the rule, Raven."

With a sigh, Raven reigned in the unruly urge to blast one of his figurines through the wall and shut off the communicator. Her therapist readjusted his grip on the yellow legal pad he seemed welded to and pushed his glasses further up a long nose. He was a kind-looking man, greying at the temples, with an emotional energy that was calming and steady. Raven appreciated that; it was the rare person who was introspective enough to project that kind of aura. She, on the other hand, was projecting all sorts of spikes and flurries. Somewhat uneasily, she crossed one leg over the other.

"Happy now?"

He smiled slightly.

"Where were we?"

"I believe I had just told you my father is a demon from a hell dimension on the planet Azarath."

"Ah, yes. I would ask how that makes you feel, but I think I can surmise."

Despite herself, Raven cracked a smile.

"Robin told me you would ask about my childhood."

"Robin is…your team leader."

"Yes."

"The one who asked you to come in."

"…yes."

"That was perceptive of him."

"He…watches out for his team."

She found herself unsure of where to look and began to count the stones in the small decorative jar that occupied the low coffee table. He followed her gaze.

"Feel free to touch anything you like."

She shot him a quick glance and tipped several clear stones into her hand. Rubbing them together in her palm, she listened quietly to another ever-so-careful question.

"This wasn't your first experience with torture, was it?"

Raven recited her mantra once or twice in her head, causing the stones to hover just off of her outstretched palm.

"No."

"What was different this time?"

The stones formed a loose circle and began to rotate, movement regulated by her breath.

"I couldn't fight it."

"You are used to fighting."

"I wish I wasn't."

"That wasn't the question."

The stones began to rotate a little faster as memories surfaced.

"I'm a hero. Whatever that means. Of course I'm used to fighting."

He wrote something down, expression carefully detached.

"So when your father hurt you…"

Raven closed her fist over the stones, stopping her powers before they spiked dangerously.

"My father was a demon. I was ready for it. I gave myself up. When I was in hell…that was different. There was always a course of action. I couldn't always see it, but…it was there."

"And now?"

"Now, there's nothing to fight. There's no ultimatum. It happened. And now it's over. I should be over it by now. This shouldn't be happening. It's all _wrong_."

Despite her best efforts, blackness crept out of her palms. She clenched her fist more tightly, watched her knuckles go white as she reigned in her powers. Dr. Levitt let the silence stretch for a moment, then changed the subject.

"What were the months following your father's death like for you?"

She shut her eyes briefly.

"Not great. I had nightmares…my powers were harder to control…but _this _never happened."

"When you say 'this', you mean the panic attacks you've been experiencing."

"Yes."

"Has it occurred to you that this recent apocalypse is also a contributing factor?"

It hadn't. As Raven swallowed, she detected sympathy in his emotional climate, which didn't help.

"That…would make sense."

Thirty excruciating minutes later, Raven left his office, feeling more drained than when she had started. With a vague smile at the placid receptionist, she left the office, grabbing a jacket reminiscent of her cloak on her way out. By the time the elevator had deposited her on the ground level of the sleek building, she had gathered herself enough to pull her hood up over her hair and button her coat.

Out on the sidewalk, the cold air swept through her hair and robbed a little of her breath. The city was busy, as usual, people sweeping by laden with shopping bags, high powered executives walking briskly back from lunch breaks. Occasional car horns broke the general hum of everyday life and cars screeched at unexpected stoplights. Raven ran both palms across her forehead as if to iron out the headache that was rapidly developing there. She was about to pull her communicator from the pocket of her jeans when a shout broke her thoughts.

"Raven! Look out!"

She barely had time to react before a robot was in front of her, strange claws outstretched as if to grab her by her arms. She was in the air in a minute, coat discarded as an encumbrance as Cyborg and Beast Boy backed into view around a street lamp, both battling their own opponents, followed by Robin and Starfire. It had been Robin who had shouted, and he was still watching her, which cost him a nasty blow to the back of the head.

She narrowed her eyes and watched long enough to make sure he was okay, then rose into the air, dark energy enveloping her hands. She made short work of the robot that had attacked her, cleaving it into a mess of wires and circuits in seconds, but there were more, and her powers were not at their strongest. Wincing as she inadvertently shattered a nearby lamppost, Raven hurtled towards the middle of the street, stopping traffic with her sudden descent.

She felt rather than saw Robin land near her, spinning his staff against an onslaught of bright red energy.

"Beast Boy! Get people to safety!"

The pedestrians had scattered, some of them knocked into walls and buildings by the sudden violence. Beast Boy, suddenly a pterodactyl, grabbed those not injured in his claws and deposited them on nearby roofs. Raven gritted her teeth and helped him, enveloping clothes and shoes in dark energy to move the injured to safety. Cyborg covered Beast Boy while Robin and Starfire joined forces in front of her, fending off attacks long enough for them to finish clearing the street. As Raven dropped the last of the injured civilians on a nearby rooftop patio, the robots broke through Starfire's attacks, sending her spinning sideways into a fire hydrant. Raven winced and parried a blow aimed for her head, standing back to back with Robin, who was fighting two of his own. Shouting over the grating sound of metal on metal, he turned his head slightly so that she could hear him.

"You okay to fight?"

She yanked at a wire, triggering a meltdown of her latest opponent.

"We'll just have to find out, won't we?"

Her eyes narrowed as two more robots closed in. Throwing her crossed forearms in front of her chest, she sent a blast of dark energy out from the pair of them. In the seconds it took for them to recover, she ascended again; she preferred to fight multiple opponents from a higher vantage point. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Robin rappel onto a nearby building, tossing explosive boomerangs from his belt as he did so. For her part, she grasped two cars with long tendrils of energy and smashed them together. The resulting explosion destroyed several robots and a good portion of the street.

Something whistled past her ear just then, and she winced, feeling familiar panic growing in her chest. Taking a deep breath, she recited her mantra once, blasting the robot behind her back several feet, where Starfire waited to finish it off. Despite intense concentration, her powers also blew up a nearby street sign, an outlet for the knot of anxiety in her chest. Raven grimaced and threw up a force field, crossing her legs in midair. It would hold for the minute or two that she needed to meditate.

Robin, fighting alongside Beast Boy and Cyborg on the ground, glanced nervously up at his now-shrouded teammate. There was no time to make sure she was all right. The robots that remained were attacking more viciously to compensate for the destruction of most of their fighting force, and it was all he could do to stay on his feet. Even as he thought it, his staff snapped in his hands. Cursing, he discarded it and leapt onto a nearby car for leverage. Bruce's training echoing in his mind, Robin pulled off an impressive back handspring, landing squarely on top of the robot headed for Beast Boy, who was lying dazed in a crater the size of a rhinoceros.

"You okay?"

Garfield stood unsteadily while Robin planted an explosive on the robot's head. By the time he had reached the green man's side, it had blown up, leaving a mess of sparking circuitry in its wake.

"Ugh…who knew rhinos could get broken ribs? Look out!"

They ducked as Starfire flew dangerously close to their heads, starbolts flying from both hands as she fended off two attackers at once. Robin put Beast Boy's arm over his shoulder.

"Let's get you to – "

It was an exclamation from Raven that interrupted him, giving them enough time to take in the four remaining enemy fighters all headed straight for Beast Boy. Robin barely managed to get a hand to his belt before Raven shot to the airspace in front of the pair of them, arms outstretched, projecting a force field of black protection.

"Leave. Them. Alone."

* * *

And as always thank you for rating/reviewing

x


	11. Power, Control

Black had enveloped Raven's eyes as well as her hands as she hovered in front of them, trembling. Her force field was being hammered ruthlessly, but she kept it in place, growling at the effort. Robin winced as the glass doors behind him shattered in their frames. He looked at Beast Boy, but his teammate was in no condition to do anything. As if reading his mind, Garfield tried to move and promptly coughed, convulsing until blood came to his lips and he fell to his knees. Robin grimaced, tightening his grip on his teammate's shoulder.

The bulbs of the streetlamps shattered in bursts of black energy as Raven let out another animal growl. Robin, looking at her trembling form, found himself doubting her control.

_Not helping, Robin._

It took him a moment to realize that the voice had sounded in his head. As he felt a flash of chagrin, Raven brought her hands down in one swift, decisive motion and cleaved the last of the bots into twitching pieces. The darkness faded from her eyes as she drifted to the ground, followed closely by Starfire. Carefully, Robin lowered Beast Boy to a sitting position and wiped his forehead with the back of one gloved hand.

"Thanks. Nice save."

Raven dipped her head in acknowledgement and crossed to Garfield's side, placing gently glowing hands over his chest.

"Where did _they _come from?"

Starfire yanked the debri from her hair, wincing as she encountered singed edges.

"We think they were defensive. We were in pursuit of the other criminal when they attacked."

Robin was watching her carefully. She detected a tight sort of anxiety in his mental landscape. Actually, a similar feeling of apprehension was emanating from all of her teammates. And they all seemed to be watching her. Having finished her healing, she stood slowly, brushing dust from her jeans.

"What?"

Beast Boy accepted a metal hand from Cyborg and straightened his spine, rubbing his newly healed ribs with one hand.

"Um…we were kinda after handyman dude. You know, 'This city needs purifying and you would kill the one brave enough to do it'…"

Raven's hand went to her pocket, where she still had some of the strange, smooth stones from her therapist's office. _They're called worry stones, _he had said. _You should take them. They help with meditation. _The act of rubbing them between her fingers reduced her sudden urge to attack everything in sight, but she felt the blood drain from her face nonetheless.

"He…got out."

Robin nodded tightly, still watching her carefully.

"From what Cyborg managed to hack out of the jail security cameras, it looks like he was working alone."

Cyborg typed a few things into his arm, brow furrowed as he watched the footage back.

"Dude's out of his mind. Faked some kind of seizure, let the medics take him halfway to an ambulance, knocked 'em out and ran for it."

Raven nodded robotically, still trying to fend off memories that made her blood run cold. She barely felt Starfire's hand on her shoulder.

"We believe the madman is wishing to join our mysterious recruiter."

More to hide her face than for any other reason, Raven summoned her coat from where it had fallen and let it envelope her, the hood hiding most of her panicked expression from view. Robin pulled out his communicator, radioing in the city for clean up and emergency medical help as he spoke.

"We tracked him to the East side of town, near the beaches. When we tried to follow him into the cliffs, the robot army here came after us. We must have tripped a force field somewhere."

Beast Boy wrenched his gaze away from Raven long enough to gesticulate in four different animal forms.

"It was _way_ trippy. But that's good news right? We know where super-dude lives now!"

Robin ran both hands through his hair.

"Not necessarily. It could just be a base. Whatever it is, we know he's got a human army too. We'll need to do some surveillance."

He shot Raven a quick worried glance, trying and failing not to betray his concern for – and attraction to – her. He had been about to ask her to take them back to Titan's Tower, but had stopped short, not wanting to put her in the uncomfortable position of refusing. She met his glance and blinked once, reading his thoughts on his face as easily as a cereal box. After a few uncomfortable seconds enveloped in icy black energy, the five of them found themselves securely in their living room. Beast Boy shivered theatrically.

"Dude! How many times do I have to tell you not to spring that dark energy stuff on me? I wasn't ready!"

Cyborg raised an eyebrow – or his metal version of one anyway, and gestured to the living room.

"Hate to break it to you, BB, but Raven isn't here. You'll have to vent your spleen some other time."

Robin, having found himself on the carpeted floor, got to his feet and dusted off his uniform.

"I've got to go talk to Aqualad about setting up some kind of surveillance. Cyborg, get to work on those robots. We brought back a head, right? Beast Boy, get yourself checked out in the medical wing. I might need you to go undercover, and I need you in perfect shape."

Visibly annoyed at his suddenly brusque tone, they obeyed, Beast Boy more reluctantly than Cyborg, who liked looking at new technology almost as much as playing video games. While he pulled out a cartoonishly large toolbox and began to dissect with almost obscene enthusiasm, Robin turned to Starfire, who had been greeted by whines from her pet maggot and was now rummaging in the fridge.

"Hey Star, can I talk to you for a second? I need you to do me a favor."

She put some mysterious goo into Silkie's bowl, then drifted over, tucking a long strand of auburn hair behind her ear.

"It is related to our present mission?"

"Sort of."

As briefly as possible, Robin told her about the missing gaps in the prison system, and the missing funding.

"I've set up a meeting with some important people in law enforcement, and Bruce made a large 'donation' to the Jump City prisons. I'd like you to work with the city to try and make them safer. You were kind of a diplomat on Tamarand, right?"

Starfire, after some initial doubt, nodded.

"I was a princess, yes. But many of your earthly ways are still strange to me. Are you sure I will be…diplomatic?"

He grinned at her, remembering the many times he had seen her comforting and liaising with civilians. People felt instinctually comfortable around Star in a way that they didn't around the other titans. Despite a lilting accent and some odd mannerisms, she was an easy person to talk to, and her empathetic nature colored her interactions. Robin trusted her to bridge the yawning gap between the titans and the people they protected…or at least to improve things slightly.

"I think you can talk to people better than the rest of us. And this requires a lot of talking. They wanted to get the whole team in to talk strategy, but we're swamped, and I figure you'll be a good representative. Besides, if anything goes south, you're one of the strongest fighters out there."

Starfire smiled slightly at the praise, the worry clearing from her brow.

"If you believe it is best, I will gladly go to this meeting."

He placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Thank you. It won't be easy."

"Diplomacy never is."

She moved to the main computer to begin gathering data, schematics, and floor plans. Star didn't let on much, but she was almost as good with computers as Cyborg, and better at hacking into earthly databases. Ideas for new training programs and more advanced weaponry were already flying from her fingers as she made notes. Robin smiled slightly watching her, then took a deep breath and disappeared into the hallway.

He stood in front of Raven's door for perhaps longer than was necessary, trying to gather himself enough to knock. It wasn't that he was _scared _of her per se, but he was hyperaware of her need for privacy and didn't want to interrupt meditation. On the flip side, they had sprung a fight on her immediately after a therapy session, and he wasn't fairly sure that she hadn't been all right either before or during the battle. As he stood there, arguing with himself, the door slid open, metal screeching discordantly against the wall.

Raven was pale, even for Raven, but her expression was fairly neutral and she had changed out of her singed clothing, into a different pair of jeans and one of her millions of oversized t-shirts.

"Um. Hi."

She smiled slightly.

"I sensed you standing here. Were you planning on knocking?"

Robin rubbed the back of his neck with one hand.

"I hadn't decided."

Her hair was damp; the scent of her shampoo clung to her frame.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay. I tried to keep the battle away from you, but…"

"I'm fine – "

She broke off and sighed, lifting her eyes to the ceiling as though there was something extremely interesting embedded in the doorframe.

"I'm supposed to stop saying that."

Robin found himself unsure of what to say, suddenly, which was stupid given the point of his presence. If he was honest with himself, he had expected her to say she was fine and slam the door in his face.

"I noticed some stuff during the fight."

She pressed her lips together and shifted her gaze again, this time to look at the ground.

"It wasn't…the most pleasant experience."

"I'm sorry."

"Not your fault."

It was his turn to sigh, mostly out of frustration.

"Cyborg is working on the robots. Hopefully he can tell us something about why they were – "

Cyborg himself came toward them, a tablet in one hand and a small box of wiring in the other.

"Speak of the devil."

With a half-glance at Raven, Cyborg held out the mini-computer for Robin's inspection.

"Was just looking for you. The robots are pretty advanced. Once you trip their sensors, they'll hone in on the GPS in the communicators and go after the titan furthest away from the other five."

Raven leaned over his shoulder to look at the schematics. He found himself, once again, distracted by the smell of her shampoo. There was something like jasmine there, and a scent he couldn't pinpoint, maybe incense? No, it was more subtle than that. Tuning back into the conversation, Robin intercepted an odd look from Cyborg and cleared his throat, feeling heat in his cheeks as Raven touched the screen lightly.

"So that's why the fight came to me. Clever."

She was right. It was a diabolical move, and one that showed just how clearly the titans were being targeted. He scowled as he handed back the tablet.

"It's a good strategy. What signals them?"

"I was getting to that," He swiped a couple of fingers across the screen. "There are sensors planted all over the city, set up kinda like digital guard dogs. I honed in on a couple of locations, but there's a self-destruct sequence programmed into the motherboard of these things. They're designed to raise an alarm – meaning a robot army – whenever somebody's gettin' too much information. I had to fry the thing before it tipped off the rest of em'."

Robin frowned.

"We can handle an attack, especially on the tower."

"That might be true. But I figured it was better if superdude up in his headquarters didn't know how close we were gettin'."

Robin conceded the point.

"You're right. Good work. Think you can get anything else we can use?"

Cyborg grinned broadly.

"Thought you'd never ask. I'm just on my way to plug their weapons structure into the main frame. We can learn their weaknesses during the next training session."

"Good. I'll let the team know."

Victor paused for a second, then shifted a blunt gaze to Raven, who looked impassively back.

"You okay, Rae? I know you weren't up to much fighting."

"I…will be."

It was a more evasive answer than she'd given Robin, but it was more honest than she tended to be. Cyborg clapped a metal hand to her shoulder.

"You need anything, let me know, all right?"

Robin watched him leave, mind already whirring with ideas to combat a robot army. Raven followed his glance.

"I should be helping."

Her voice was bitter, and when he looked at her, her jaw was tight.

"You should be taking care of yourself."

She folded her arms across her chest.

"I can do both. It's not like I'm suddenly incapable."

"I didn't say you were."

He tried and failed to capture her gaze.

"Raven, you know you don't have to fight to help the team. We need you, powers or no."

She blinked slowly, and Robin thought he saw tears in her eyes before she looked away.

"I feel…useless. Like he took something from me."

Robin put a hand on her shoulder, feeling her shaking slightly under his grip.

"Raven…you're a lot of things, but I don't think useless will ever be one of them."

A shrill beeping rent the air, not the alarm bell this time, but Robin's communicator. An incoming call only sounded the alarm when the number was unfamiliar, and he frowned as he flipped it open. His eyes widened as he looked at the familiar face that occupied the screen, feeling a strange jolt in the region of his stomach. Raven glanced from the communicator to his face, then backed into her bedroom, letting the shadows envelope her face.

"I'm guessing you need to take that."

* * *

Thanks so much for reading! Reviews always appreciated.

xx


	12. Stormclouds

Robin looked from her now-shrouded face to his communicator, half-intending to stop her, tell her he could take the call later. Raven was so rarely open to talking like this, and she clearly needed someone to talk to, but…

"Robin. Take the call."

"Okay, but find me later, all right?"

She nodded slightly and backed away. He swore under his breath as she disappeared into her room, door sliding shut behind her. He was still swearing as he pressed the 'answer call' button, stalking down the hallway faster than was strictly necessary.

"Bruce."

"Hey, Dick. Bad time?"

His adopted father looked calm and unruffled, as per usual, but he had read more on Robin's face than he had meant to communicate. He ran a hand over his forehead.

"Kind of, yeah. Hang on a second."

Once he was safely ensconced in his study and Bruce's face was projected on the screen that hung over his desk, Robin removed his mask. Bruce smiled slightly, and Robin thought he saw pride in his expression.

"It's been a while."

"Yeah. Sorry, things have been…"

As he was trying to come up with the words he needed to describe the last few months, Bruce held up his hands in mock surrender.

"Woah, hey, not your fault. We've both had a lot on our plates."

Alfred came into view just then, a toolbox in one hand and a roll of bandages in the other. Robin raised an eyebrow.

"Clearly."

Bruce shrugged and half grimaced.

"All in a days work," he paused briefly to accept the bandages from Alfred and wind them around a nasty gash in his forearm. "So what was I interrupting back there?"

Robin winced slightly, unsure of how to answer. His adopted father could read most of his thoughts on his face, and would definitely know if he was lying. On the other hand, Raven's problems were her own, and he wasn't about to go sharing them without her permission.

"I was just…talking…to Raven. We're having a problem with a new villain around here."

He knew Bruce would detect the half-truth, but to Robin's surprise, he let it go.

"That's what I was calling about, actually."

Robin bristled slightly. Ironically, he didn't like to admit when his pride was hurt, but he also hated Bruce poking around in his crime fighting. He had a lot to live up to as it was, and constantly struggling to prove himself didn't help much. Bruce smiled slightly.

"Relax, tiger. I'm not muscling in on your turf."

Robin relaxed his body language only slightly, resenting the comfortable intuition of his guardian.

"What's going on?"

Bruce scowled for the first time, and the air was suddenly full of the sound of typing.

"We've been having trouble in Gotham lately. Politics. Just about my least favorite thing, but you can't avoid them sometimes."

Robin leaned forward, hand hovering over his mousepad as he scrolled through the encrypted file that had just been transferred.

"Sebastian Hady…why do I know that name?"

"He's been all over the news lately…guy is running for mayor in Gotham."

A frown tugged at Robin's forehead as he scanned paragraphs as fast as he could.

"Financial support from the Iceberg Lounge…Public endorsement from Judson Caspian…platform is…_what?_"

Batman's voice was characteristically grim, but uncharacteristically worried.

"Exactly."

Robin spluttered incoherently for a moment, then recovered and ran both hands roughly through his hair.

"So this guy is running on a bill that would criminalize superheroes? What, does he want to shut down the Justice League?"

Bruce grimaced.

"I gather that's his long-term plan. He's an ambitious guy. Ambitious and corrupt. You recognize the Iceberg Lounge?"

Robin was scowling fiercely at this point, frown etched so firmly on his face that he doubted it would ever disappear entirely.

"The Penguin's business."

"Exactly. In other words, it's a drug den and crime syndicate headquarters."

"And Judson Caspian…isn't he the guy you think was the Reaper?"

"I could never prove it. And he was smart enough to calm down and partner with a few crime lords…now I have to see him at every fucking party with his pretentious wine glasses…"

Bruce snorted, clearly still frustrated by his early failures. Robin, still coming to terms with the implications of what he was being told, rested his head in his hands.

"So this guy, the guy running for mayor, he's partnered with the villains of Gotham City to rid the world of superheroes in the least objectionable way possible."

Batman, though clearly equally horrified, was annoyingly calm.

"I wouldn't say it's that cut and dry, but yes, essentially."

Robin ran both hands over his face, feeling as though his list of things to worry about had just tripled.

"And he has public support, doesn't he?"

Bruce sighed.

"You know as well as I do how people feel about heroes, Robin. Once the stardust wears off, we're as scary as the bad guys."

As briefly as possible, Robin told him what he had been uncovering lately, including a brief rundown of their most recent villain. Bruce's frown deepened with every word.

"This is worse than I thought," he paused to take down a few notes. "I called because Hady mentioned 'political allies' in Jump City. If this…recruiter…is the ally he's talking about…who knows what other supporters he has."

"You think he has a shot."

Bruce's voice was bitter.

"Of course he has a shot. Politicians always do. They can rebrand as many times as they want. We don't have that advantage," he smiled grimly. "At least, our hero selves don't."

Robin raised an eyebrow.

"I'm sensing a Bruce Wayne initiative somewhere in here."

Bruce chuckled hoarsely, but not without humor.

"As soon as I knew which way the wind was blowing, I figured I should hedge my bets. Bruce Wayne has been distinctly anti-hero these past months."

Behind Bruce, Alfred chuckled not-so-subtly. Batman turned around, grinning, as his butler leaned into the shot.

"Something to say?"

Alfred grinned.

"Good to see you again, Master Richard. As you can see, your father is as duplicitous as ever."

Robin grinned despite himself.

"Good to see you too, Alfred. And I can't say I'm surprised."

Bruce gave his old friend a glance brimming with mock-fury.

"Don't you have shoes to polish or something?"

As Alfred cuffed him around the head and disappeared from sight, Bruce turned vaguely serious again.

"A week ago, Hady approached me for financial backing. I agreed to meet with him to discuss it…at a party, naturally. I thought I'd give you the opportunity to gather some intel."

"Undercover?"

Bruce grinned slyly.

"Black tie. I know you love your formal events."

His smile was definitely devious now.

"Maybe you can bring Raven."

Caught off guard, Robin spluttered for a minute, feeling his face go red.

"I…that's not…"

"I'll send you the details."

Given to abrupt gestures, Bruce signed off with a wink that suggested he knew exactly why Robin was so uncomfortable.

A knock at his door made him jump. He knew it was her before he opened it, knew because they had training scheduled that afternoon, but also because he knew what her knock sounded like. _How creepy are you? _Very creepy. Very creepy was the answer to that. Who knew what someone's knock sounded like? Shaking his head, Robin opened the door, checking his watch with the uncomfortable realization that he and Bruce had been talking for almost two hours.

"You said I should come find you. I came. I found."

He smiled slightly, fighting to keep his feelings away from his face. One of the many amazing things about Raven was that she was perceptive in a way that was mostly unsettling.

"Yeah, I just…got the sense that maybe you needed to talk. Sorry we got interrupted."

He knew as he said it that it was too late, anyway. Raven's 'sharing' moods were few and far between, and this one had passed. Even so, her gaze softened slightly.

"I'm…I'm all right now."

He tucked his hands into his pockets.

"Okay, well…any time you do want to talk…"

She smiled slightly, though there was a hint of sadness in her expression.

"Thank you."

He took a deep breath, changing the subject quickly before he embarrassed himself.

"You still up for training tomorrow?"

* * *

Raven looked warily across the gym, heart pounding far too hard in her chest as she moved in a slow circle around Robin's tense form. He gave her a quick once over, pausing to frown slightly.

"Good, but lower your hands a little. Don't give anyone an opening."

Raven, who was used to shielding herself with dark energy, winced and adjusted as Robin moved forward, attacking with a quick sideways slash to her neck. She blocked it easily, but he was already in motion again, this time going for a low kick. She sidestepped and saw an opening in the way he landed, foot perpendicular to her own. _One foot behind…_she stepped forward, putting the back of her calf against his, then applied pressure to his opposite shoulder, forcing him back into a bridge.

"If you weren't an acrobat that would've worked," she muttered, returning to a defensive position as he moved flawlessly into a back handspring. He grinned.

"What, did you think I was going to make this easy for you?"

They had been training for almost an hour now. Robin, having found that Raven knew most of the basics of hand-to-hand combat and had some Judo training, had moved quickly into the areas where she was weak, mostly where she relied heavily on her powers. As it turned out, self-defense was her weakest link; she rarely let villains get close enough to attack, and when she did, inky black shields came to her rescue. Robin found that Jujitsu was best for high-contact defense, so that was what they had been drilling.

"All right, what are your options for stand-up?"

Her eyes narrowed slightly and flicked from his knee to his left wrist.

"Good. Go for it."

Lightning-fast, she placed her foot at his instep, gripped his collar with the same hand and his wrist with the other, and pivoted into a sitting position, sending him flying over her in an almost circular fall. He was about to remind her to maintain her grips, then realized that she had and smiled.

"All right, how do you follow up?"

Using his weight, she kicked his leg out, then rolled onto one knee, still maintaining her grip on his collar.

"Good. What are your options from here?"

"Arm bar or choke."

"And if I wind up on my hands and knees?"

"Triangle."

"Or?"

"Closed guard."

"Correct."

He smiled in spite of himself. He had known Raven was a fast book learner, but she had impressed him with her fighting intuition. Of course, he shouldn't have been all that surprised; she was an experienced fighter, even when she was relying on her powers.

"All right, let's drill the other sequence."

Raven stood, feeling slightly unsteady. The training was going well, and she was glad, but she was still nervous, mostly because she had no idea what could trigger a deluge of memories, none of which she was ready to relive. She did have to admit that Robin was an excellent teacher, once you got over the bossiness. And he wasn't coddling her, which she appreciated.

Even as she thought it, he stepped forward, aiming to tackle her. He watched carefully as he did so. Robin wasn't trying to go easy on her; she would have hated that, but he was more aware of her body language than usual, and more aware of his own actions. As he moved forward a second time, he saw her tense up as she stepped backward. A look came briefly over her face, one of poorly-disguised panic, but Robin also thought he saw pain in her eyes. Immediately, he let go of the grip he had on her wrist and stepped back, holding his hands at chest height.

"You okay?"

She shook her head slightly to clear it and rubbed her wrist with one hand.

"I…yeah. Sorry."

Robin, feeling suddenly as though something was fighting to get out of his chest, shook his head.

"Don't be. You need a break?"

Raven took a deep breath and shook her head.

"No. Here, tackle me again."

He hesitated for a moment, but moved into action again when she shot him a dirty look. She hated feeling like an invalid, and Robin's sensitivity, while kind in a way that she hadn't been expecting, irritated her. He sprang towards her, looking to pin her against the wall. Thinking quickly, Raven sidestepped to avoid his grip, but he followed it up with a different sweep, and she found herself on the ground. _Three points of contact. _Hastily, she gripped his sleeve, then put her feet at his knees, throwing him off balance. He nodded approvingly as she pressed her advantage until he was sitting opposite her, smiling at her success.

"Good, but get to that contact more quickly. If we had actually been fighting, I would have…"

He pinned her easily with one knee by way of demonstration, holding her to the mat. Then, abruptly, she was no longer in the gym. Darkness flashed into her mind, then dizzying pain as she felt a sickening blow to her side. Ribs cracked. She spat blood, but it made no difference, just earned her a blow to the face. _What did you do to my powers? _Handcuffs. Bleeding. _Why are you doing this? _A knife. More blood. Dripping, hot, breathing dust, choking on dust and mouth-blood. _Stop. Please. _Grinning. _Your friends will come to save you and I will have them too. _

"Raven!"

He must have been calling her name for several seconds, because his voice was panicked.

_Your friends will come to save you._

She had thrown up a force field, she realized, she must have because her hands were still leaking inky blackness.

_And I will have them too. _

"Raven, it's all right. You're safe."

_Release her._ Knife across her stomach.

She was in a corner, somehow, knees pulled up to her chest. Robin was crouched in front of her.

_Hurt her again_

He was moving closer.

_And this goes through your skull._

She couldn't breathe.

_Let her go. _

He wrapped his arms around her, she knew because they were warm across her chest.

_Can you stand if I release you?_

She gripped his forearm until her knuckles were white.

_Doubt it._

His free hand moved up and down her arm, soothing the tremors that wracked her body.

"It's all right."

He seemed to be saying that over and over, like she hadn't heard him the first time.

_Just get my powers back._

She stopped shaking. Collapsed against him, head to his shoulder.

"I'm scared."

He took a deep breath, rested his chin on the top of her head.

"I know."

* * *

Thanks for reading! And I appreciate the influx of detailed reviews; helps me out a lot.

xxxx


	13. Morning Frost

The next morning dawned clear and cold, a thin layer of ice having spread itself over the shoreline during the night. Raven thought absently that the frosted buildings of Jump City, mist shrouded as they were, resembled the spires of Azarath before they had burned. _You're morbid this morning. _The voice in her head was definitely Happy's, who resented even the slightest of bad moods. There were times when she was grateful to have physical manifestations of her emotions – it made them easier to subdue, for one thing – but now was not one of those times.

With a sigh that sent a faint cloud drifted from her mouth into the chilled air, Raven turned back to the tower, intending to seek breakfast before the others came hunting for food. She liked their company sometimes, more often than she tended to admit actually, but today she felt vaguely wrong in a way that she couldn't quite pinpoint, and leaned towards solitude.

Even as she thought it, she sensed a presence behind her. When her eyes caught up with her body, she winced.

"What are you doing up here?"

Robin shrugged, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

"You know I always watch the sun rise."

She had known that. She had forgotten.

"Oh. Right."

Raven was forcibly reminded of that morning, months ago, the last time they had watched a rooftop sunrise together. That day had been the end of the world. _Seriously? What is _up _with you? _Happy was as close to not-Happy as she ever got. Raven put her fingertips to her temple, easing the tension headache that was threatening at the edges of her consciousness. Robin had joined her at the edge of the roof and was radiating worry like some kind of sympathetic microwave.

"I'm better."

He gave her a quick glance, then returned his gaze to the sun, which was peeking over the horizon, resting in a molten bed of orange-dyed clouds.

"I didn't ask."

She shivered a little and wrapped her arms around herself for warmth.

"You didn't have to."

"Hey! You said you didn't do that unless we were in battle."

She rolled her eyes, smiling slightly despite herself.

"I didn't have to, idiot, you're projecting all over the place."

His emotional energy receded slightly, chagrin coloring its edges.

"Sorry. We don't have to talk about it."

"Maybe we do. If it's going to make things weird."

He leaned too-casually against the wall.

"What's weird? Nothing's weird. Everything is totally normal."

She shot him an irritated glance, but a smile tugged at her lips.

"Quit it."

He sighed and pushed himself away from the wall.

"Look, Raven, I just…I want to make sure…"

"It wasn't your fault."

He stopped, and she sensed guilt as he looked at the ground, speaking to it rather than her.

"It felt like it was."

She sighed and turned to face him, noting how oddly anguished his expression was.

"It wasn't. Trust me. Anything can set it off. Anything. If it hadn't been you, it would have been the television. Or my communicator. Or my uniform. Or…the freaking doorknob, for all I know."

She faced the sunrise again, feeling the edges of its rays touch her face.

"It's just…there, and there's nothing I can do to prevent it. Nothing you can do either, so stop beating yourself up."

He sighed.

"Okay. But for the record, I'm still sorry."

It was her turn to look at the ground. Robin saw purple in the shine of her hair, the sun illuminating every piece of her.

"I want to keep training."

"But – "

"I want to learn. I _need _to learn, Robin."

Still he hesitated, remembering the look on her face, in her eyes, which shone like amethysts now in the sunlight.

"Please."

"Of course I'll train you."

He paused.

"Just…next time…stop when you have to. You don't have to learn everything in one day."

She dipped her head briefly and looked at him out of the corner of her eye.

"Robin…thank you…for…for knowing what to do."

Caught by surprise by the sincerity, he shrugged.

"Anyone would have – "

"No. They wouldn't. I mean it, thank you."

Then, to Robin's utter shock, she hugged him briefly, pressing him to her just long enough to leave the scent of her shampoo in his mouth. After a moment of hesitation, he reached up to touch her back until they broke apart, both blushing. Grinning in spite of himself, Robin rubbed the back of his neck with one hand.

"I…uh…you're welcome."

There was a pause during which they both looked out at the sunrise, waiting until it had lifted above the horizon, dispelling most of the mist that had settled through Jump City. When it had, Robin checked his watch, already running through schedules in his head.

"Breakfast?"

Raven smiled slightly and followed him to the stairs.

The rest of the team was already seated, Beast Boy with his usual heaping plate of tofu eggs – Raven could never decide whether he was vegetarian or vegan – Cyborg standing over something that sizzled and smelled enticingly like ham, and Starfire with a strange gelatinous goop that made Raven feel faintly sick just to look at. Robin led the way into the kitchen, heading straight for the eggs, while Raven went to put the kettle on before noticing that it was already whistling. She gave Cyborg a sideways glance, and he winked back at her.

"Heard you get up this morning. Figured you'd want your tea."

She raised an eyebrow.

"Thanks, Dad."

Cyborg was, as usual, unperturbed.

"I prefer big brother. Now eat your breakfast."

She smiled in spite of herself and glided to the counter, sliding into a seat opposite Beast Boy then immediately regretting it when he burped and grinned at her.

"Heya, Raven! How's things?"

She sighed.

"Hey yourself."

She didn't miss the look he exchanged with Starfire, but thankfully neither of them had the chance to ask how she was doing before Robin sat down, wearing his announcement face. Raven paid attention like the rest of the team, wondering vaguely if this had anything to do with his mysterious phone call of the other day.

"I've got some news."

Cyborg settled down next to him, giving his eggs a loving glance before he dug in with almost indecent enthusiasm.

"Sup, chief?"

Robin was, as usual, somewhat humorless as he pulled a flash drive, presumably full of complicated files, from his pocket.

"I had a call from Batman in Gotham."

That got everyone's attention. Particularly Beast Boy, who idolized Robin's adoptive father almost to the point of creepiness.

"Seriously?" he squeaked, popping briefly into a mouse.

Raven and Cyborg rolled their eyes in tandem as Starfire giggled.

"What was it about?"

Robin met her gaze, and she thought she read a confusing mixture of feelings in his eyes before he looked away again.

"He's got a lead on our mystery man. There's…some undercover involved."

That got people's attention, Beast Boy in particular.

"Oh man! I am _so good _at undercover stuff? Is it like a James Bond movie? Is it? Is it?"

Raven gave him a bored look.

"Please tell me he's not coming with us."

Beast Boy looked indignant.

"What? I can be stealthy! Watch," and he zapped into a fly, buzzing irritatingly around Raven's head until she flicked her finger and seized his wings in dark energy. When he morphed back into human form, she held him by the collar for a few moments, then dropped him unceremoniously on the ground, where he glared at her for several seconds. Robin raised an eyebrow, ignoring the giggling emanating from Cyborg and Starfire.

"Actually, we will need Beast Boy to go undercover. Just not at the same place."

Garfield, having climbed sulkily onto his abandoned stool, perked up.

"Undercover? Awesome! Where?"

"I need you to investigate the cave network around the cliffs where the robots came from. It'll be a risky procedure, but worth it if you can gather information. Cyborg, you'll be collecting data from this – " he held up a small, rectangular piece of glass and looked at it almost reverently. "It's a camera, of sorts. It also picks up high quality audio and electronic interference. If we strap it to your ankle, Garfield, it will collect information that Cyborg can analyze. Star, I want you on backup. If things go wrong, you'll get in there and help him out."

Starfire nodded, looking excited to be fighting again. She had dutifully given him reports from her first meeting with city council, and it sounded like things were going well, but he had sense restlessness in her smile and had thought it would be best to postpone further meetings until after this mission. Lastly, he looked at Raven again, willing himself not to blush. It wasn't a real date. It was an undercover operation.

"Raven, you'll come with me to Gotham."

She frowned slightly, but Robin detected interest in her eyes and elaborated.

"Bruce is hosting a party, and one particular guest will be a person of interest. Your perceptive field thing could come in very handy."

She nodded.

"When would we leave?"

"The party is in a week, but Bruce wants us there a day or two beforehand…he's quite the host."

He smiled slightly, then returned to business, giving the team a brief rundown of his conversation with Bruce. They all grew serious, shadows darkening their faces as they began to understand the magnitude of the conspiracy they had found themselves in the middle of.

Cyborg eventually broke the silence. He had hacked into Robin's flash drive in a matter of seconds and was looking through files, frowning intensely.

"A couple of these evil dudes might have hackable IP addresses. I'll get on that."

Robin stood up as Starfire collected dishes from around the counter and Raven floated to the sink to rinse out her teacup.

"Good idea. Everyone else, stealth training. Now."

Starfire, elbow deep in soapy water, gave him the dirtiest look that ever came across her face.

"I am in the middle of what humans would call 'something'."

Robin colored slightly and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Sorry. When…when you get a chance. Thanks, Star."

She softened as Raven retrieved a dishtowel from under the sink and began to dry while Garfield hung from the ceiling in monkey form and put things away. Cyborg wandered off to the master computer, muttering to himself as he scanned various files. Raven followed him with her eyes and flicked the water from her hands.

"If you all want to go to practice, I can finish here."

Starfire smiled brightly and drained the sink.

"For this, I thank you, friend."

Beast Boy dropped to the floor and flashed her a grin before he took off.

"Thanks, Rae."

As she ran the towel over the rim of her mug, Robin looked across at her from where he was propped up against the wall, arms folded across his chest.

"Want to help Cyborg?"

She raised her eyebrows and looked pointedly at their half-metal friend, who was smoking slightly as his fingers flew over six different keyboards at once. Robin grinned despite himself as he followed her gaze.

"Oookay…I'll rephrase: Do you want to get yelled at by Cyborg?"

Raven laughed a little.

"As fun as that sounds, I have therapy."

"Oh, really? Globe guy?

She scowled as she hung the towel over the oven handle.

"On second thought, I'll take the angry metal guy."

Robin smiled slightly as Cyborg slammed his hand down on a button that made the screen flash alarmingly.

"I would rethink that if I were you."

She sighed.

"Yeah, I should go. Ugh. He's going to ask a lot of questions."

Robin felt a flash of sympathy as he straightened up and clapped her shoulder.

"Good luck with that. I'm going to go try and teach Beast Boy how to be quiet."

She groaned softly and grabbed her coat on her way to the door.

"Good luck with _that. _See you later."

* * *

! Thanks so much for all the reviews! I'm glad so many of you are getting the human-ness of the characters. Let me know how you like the updates.

xxxxx


	14. A Bar Called Hurricane

bonus points if you get the harry potter reference

* * *

"No."

She was shaking, sweat was beading on her brow, her powers were threatening to explode from her and race around the room, destroying everything in their path, including the little man sitting in front of her, asking her to relive her worst nightmares.

"Raven. Tell me what happened next."

"No!"

She gripped the armrests of her chair, dug her fingernails into the wood.

"Push past it. What happened when you woke up?"

She tasted something acrid, bile rising in her throat.

"I…can't…"

The cool rush in her veins signaled the release of power. She bit it back, stopped the shadows, left them trembling around her hands.

"Get…out…of…here…"

Her words came out in a low growl, one that made her enemies flinch and her friends stare.

"I will not. You won't hurt me."

She felt panic like ice water on her back.

"I will! You need…you need to leave…"

She gritted her teeth as a delicate figurine exploded behind her. Her therapist held up his notebook to shield his face from the debri, then fixed her with a calm look.

"This isn't going to stop until you finish."

Shaking her head, Raven spat through clenched teeth, shaking so hard she feared her bones would shatter.

"I'm telling you…I…_can't!_"

He crossed one leg over the other.

"Of course you can."

Desperate to stop it, Raven fixed her eyes on the little marbles that sat so innocently on his desk. He followed her gaze, but was characteristically quiet, letting her figure things out for herself. Still trembling, she sent her powers to the stones. They flew out of the bowl at an alarming rate, forming a vortex around her, dark energy crackling at their edges.

"I woke up on the floor of the warehouse."

He smiled slightly and made a small note.

"Go on."

"When he saw I was awake, he broke one of my fingers…to prove my powers were gone."

She felt him adjusting, moderating his emotional climate, making sure he was ready to hear it. The stones spun faster.

"He broke the others when I tried to fight."

Said fingers were still gripping the edges of the armrests, threatening to split the wood.

"Hit me in the face. Stomped on my stomach."

Her stones spun faster, collided with each other, some of them exploding and settling into the carpet like little shards of ice.

"Couldn't breathe. Couldn't fight him. He cuffed me to the ceiling. Took my cloak. Said there should be blood. To send the right message."

Tears streamed down her cheeks, but she didn't notice them; she was too busy trying not to destroy the whole building.

"I fought. Thought if I broke my wrists I could get my hands free. The cuffs tore me open."

Despite his modulated control, there was a flicker of sympathy and echoes of sadness from the man in front of her. When she was silent however, he probed further, and Raven, having started now, found herself unable to stop.

"How long did he hold you like that?"

"I don't know. Hours. Two, maybe three."

"And what happened during that time?"

"Talked," she whispered hoarsely. "About the renovations he was making on his house. About how this city had gone to the dogs. About…about my father."

"What specifically?"

She shook her head, forcing closed the pair of eyes that threatened to open underneath her own, picking up several books to add to the tornado that whirled around her.

"Said I was the spawn of Satan. Said I invited evil."

"Did he torture you?"

"I…I don't know. He hurt me. Stabbed me when I moved. Is that torture?"

Dr. Levitt cleared his throat. His emotional climate spiked, and Raven winced at the sadness she sensed there, scowled as it moved out like a sea of energy that cracked electric.

"Yes, Raven, that would be torture."

She shook her head.

"Stop it. Stop it, I can feel it."

He stopped scribbling, met her eyes over the top of his glasses.

"I'm sorry."

The field receded, settled back into calm. Raven shut her eyes.

"What happened next?"

"He added more blood."

"How?" he asked softly.

"Knife. Back and stomach. Set up a video camera. Sent a message to my friends, said they would come to save me and he would have them to."

"And they did."

She nodded, the stones spiraling more slowly now, some falling to the ground.

"Knocked him out. Robin unlocked me. Couldn't walk. Couldn't breathe or talk."

"Did you feel comfortable with Robin carrying you?"

She shook her head, a sob choking her.

"It hurt. Everything hurt. Thought he was going to hurt me."

"But he didn't."

"He would never…he was so angry…"

The other stones fell from her thundercloud, raining onto the carpet.

"Wanted to kill him. Wanted to help me."

She cleared her throat and wiped the tears from her eyes, releasing the remaining marbles. They clattered as they fell, littering the carpet with tiny specks of blue-grey.

"I passed out on the way to the tower. Woke up in the medical wing."

The books were next, falling haphazardly on spines, crumpled pages mingling with muffled thumps.

"Went to my room. Finished healing."

"There was a lot to heal."

She nodded, finding it easier to modulate her tone now; the story had been extracted form her like some kind of poison and what followed came more easily to her lips.

"Broken wrist, broken fingers, four broken ribs, internal bleeding, ten or twelve flesh wounds, punctured lung, concussion."

Dr. Levitt crossed one leg over the other and made another note.

"How long did it take to fully recover?"

She winced.

"About a week."

"And how long did you tell your friends you needed to recover?"

She lowered her gaze.

"I told them I was fine the day after."

The silence stretched for a minute before she muttered quietly,

"I didn't want them to worry."

"But they did."

"Yeah," she sighed and looked at the wreckage around her. "I'm sorry about your stuff."

He smiled slightly and followed her gaze.

"That's all right. I dare say I have too much of it."

* * *

Raven stumbled out onto the street, wondering vaguely how red her eyes were and how noticeable she would have to be when she slipped back into the tower. Teleportation was out of the question with her emotions this unstable, and she was sure to encounter someone on her way to her bedroom. It was the thought of a hug from Starfire that sent her to the bar. That and the thought of them worrying about her any more.  
It was a dingy place that she had sometimes frequented in her early years on earth, and her early years with the titans. The door rang softly behind her, announcing her entrance to the patrons, none of whom gave her a second glance. Nobody asked for ID as she slid onto an empty stool near one of the dirty brick walls. The place was grimy, the walls peppered with neon signs and old band posters, the leather in the booths and on the stools peeling away from the yellowish foam beneath it. But they had decent whiskey and were mostly devoid of pretentious cocktails, and none of them asked too many questions.

Sal appeared from the back, running a rag that looked only slightly cleaner than the walls around a beer glass. The woman was middle aged with a thin frame and hair cropped close to her head. She smiled when she saw Raven.

"Hey there, Rae. Long time."

Raven lowered her hood, prompting a smirk from the bartender.

"Do you ever not wear that thing?"

She raised an eyebrow.

"Do you ever not wear those pants?"  
Sal glanced down at her torn jeans and rolled her eyes.

"Point taken. What can I get for you?"

She lingered on Raven's eyes an instant too long. _I knew they were red. _

"Whiskey. Ice."

She had never gotten used to saying 'on the rocks'; she just felt stupid when she tried. Sal glanced at her as she poured the drink.

"Are you going to get really wasted? Should I take your keys or something?"

Raven shrugged, wrapping her hands around the cool glass.

"Don't have keys, so it shouldn't matter."

Sal sighed, concern briefly coloring her open-book face.

"Should I be worried?"

Sal was one of the few people to whom Raven never lied. She had helped her when she had first arrived in Jump City, fleeing Azarath and all the pain of her prophesied existence there. Unfamiliar with earth's culture, she had wandered into the bar hoping to find a place to observe and acclimatize, and had found Sal instead.

"It's been a rough couple of months. I just need a drink and some peace and quiet."

Sal fixed her with a blunt look, and Raven felt, as usual, that she was being assessed.

"That I can give you. Holler if you need anything – or want to give up on this mystery girl routine you've got going."

Raven managed a grin.

"What, and give up on my silent, brooding charm?"

A new customer slid into a barstool and rapped his knuckles on the table. Sal rolled her eyes, draping her towel over her shoulder.

"You've got about as much charm as a paper bag, sunshine."

A few drinks later, Sal was giving her side eye across the bar. The last time she had been this drunk, she had thrown up on the sidewalk outside and accidentally set off a car alarm with a blast of dark energy before passing out in an alley. Not her finest hour, but she had just discovered that her father intended to use her for a portal and destroy the earth, so Sal had excused the behavior.

Now, the world had taken on pleasantly glowing edges and Raven found herself grateful that her powers were so drained. Had she been at full strength, she likely would have been pulling bricks out of the wall and giggling to herself. She swayed gently on her perch, moving in time to the music, and ran her fingers along the edge of the bar. Sal, who had been flirting with a girl on the other end of said bar, approached her, concern written on her expressive face.

"Anybody to pick you up?"

Raven smiled dreamily, focusing with difficulty on Sal's frowning face.

"Trying to get rid of me?"

Sal shook her head and gave her an exasperated look, leaning her forearms against the polished wood.

"Never, princess, but you know it's almost midnight, right?"

Raven winced. She had left the tower around twelve that afternoon, which meant she had been gone for twelve hours.

"Didn't mean to do that. Better go."

She staggered to her feet and immediately fell back against the wall as the world lurched alarmingly. Sal sighed.

"Swear to god, Raven, last time you were this fucked up it was because there was going to be an apocalypse."

Raven looked at her vaguely.

"No apocalypse. Don't worry. You're fine. Everything is fiiiiiine."

She sank back onto the stool.

"I'll just sit here for a few minutes until I can teleport."

Sal came around the counter, looking alarmed.

"Oh no. There's no way I'm letting _that _happen. Where's your communicator?"

Raven rummaged in her coat pocket for a moment, then handed it over.

"Looks stupid, doesn't it? Who makes their cell phone _yellow_?"

Sal rolled her eyes and flipped it open.

"I'm going to make a call."

* * *

Thanks for reading/reviewing/some of you are really into it I love it

xxxxx


	15. Robots Don't Drink

long chapter to compensate for a long absence

* * *

"Hey Boy Wonder. You need to keep better track of your team."

Robin rolled over and ran a hand over his eyes, trying to clear the sleep from them as the tinny voice on the other end of his communicator sounded sarcastically from his right hand. He sat up before answering, clearing his throat as the thing beeped insistently at him, the beeping that had woken him in the first place. Eventually, he managed to retrieve a t-shirt from under his bed and pull it over his head, speaking muffled through the cotton.

"Sorry, who is this?"

He squinted at the screen and turned on a light, glimpsing a bar, hearing muffled music, and taking in the woman with the short hair and piercings before Raven came into focus behind her, looking more than worse for wear.

"Ah…shit."

He was suddenly wide-awake, worry in his throat.

"It's Sal. Pleasure to meet you. We've never met, but your girlfriend here is an old friend and I'm not keen on the idea of her teleporting."

Robin sighed, running a hand through his hair and vaguely wondering how ridiculous it looked before things caught up with him and worry for Raven eclipsed his vanity.

"Sent me the address and give me twenty minutes."

He shut the communicator and rummaged for jeans, swearing under his breath. It felt like he had been swearing a lot lately. Raven didn't usually drink; she said hangovers messed up her meditation and besides poisoning your body was up there with the dumbest things a person could do. That was on a good day though, and she seemed to be having a string of bad ones.

He pulled up to the bar in a rental car that he borrowed in emergencies; as much as he loved his motorcycle, he doubted Raven's ability to maintain balance. She was there at the bar, arm draped over a woman's shoulders, presumably the Sal who had called him. She greeted him with a quick once over.

"I can see why she likes you. You've got a certain douchey charm."

Robin raised an eyebrow, uncertain how to respond. Actually, it was difficult to think about anything other than the 'Raven likes you' part.

"Um…"

Raven, focusing on him with apparent difficulty, suddenly smiled.

"Robin! Man, it's good to _see _you."

Sal removed the arm that was over her shoulder and handed it to Robin.

"Maybe I can get back to work now?"

She straightened her shirt, looking vaguely amused despite her annoyed tone.

"Take care of yourself, hon."

Raven nodded vaguely, then looked at Robin.

"You here to take me home? Shit, that means I'm going to be embarrassed in the morning, doesn't it?"

Robin shook his head, folding his arms across his chest.

"'Fraid so. Beast Boy is never going to let you live this down."

She frowned sulkily.

"That's mean."

"Or, you know, Beast Boy."

"He is _so _not funny."

He laughed despite himself. This was perhaps the oddest situation he had ever found himself a part of, which was odd in itself. Villains smashing up the street was all in a day's work. Picking up drunk friends in bars…that was weird. Even as he thought it, said drunk friend swayed dizzily, looking as though she were about to pass out. Robin caught her hastily by the arm.

"Woah, woah, hey."

He wound up taking most of her weight, but she refused to let him carry her.

"I'm perfectly capable of walking…just not in a straight line."

He rolled his eyes as they made their slow way to the door.

"Right."

"And your sarca-ashm is not appreciated."

The street, when they made their way out of the bar, was quiet, cars wooshing silently by like the rush of the ocean. The light that bathed the street could be tracked to the street lamps, which flickered comfortingly. Raven, having shoved herself away from Robin, was smiling absently at the moon.

"It's a gorgeous night, isn't it?"

Not thinking, Robin stared at her face, which was lit by the moonlight.

"It really is, yeah," there was a pause before he cleared his throat and added that they should probably get home though, big day tomorrow. Raven turned to face him, stumbling slightly.

"What's tomorrow?"

Robin raised his eyebrows as he unlocked the car.

"So Star didn't tell you she's taking you shopping, then."

Raven, even in her drunken state, allowed a look of pure horror to cross her face at the thought. He laughed as he helped her into the car and crossed to the driver's side.

"You'll be fine. Besides, it's not like you can wear a band t-shirt to one of Bruce's parties."

She glared at nothing in particular and folded her arms across her chest.

"Watch me."

Robin laughed a little and turned onto the highway, glancing in the rear view mirror as he did so. There was a pause during which Raven watched the stars and Robin watched the road, trying and failing to avoid small half-glances at her face. Her eyes were rimmed in red.

"So…therapy didn't go well."

She sighed heavily and pulled one knee up against her chest.

"Why'd you have to bring that up?"

He stole another glance at her, then at the rear-view mirror, where he could see a black car switch lanes behind them.

"Thought you might want to talk about it."

"Well I don't. It's shtupid anyway. Doesn't m-matter."

There was a petulance in her voice that Robin rarely heard there, echoes of her childhood self.

"What doesn't?"

She was silent for a moment, swaying slightly in her seat as though to the tune of music only she could hear.

"Me. I don't."

Robin clenched his jaw.

"That's not true."

She put her fingers to her temples.

"I just…I'm so tired of everyone worrying about me all the time. I'm not _helping _anyone, I'm just a liability."

Her words, still slightly blurred as they left her mouth, had taken on the self-loathing quality that Robin hated to hear from her.

"And I get so tired of hearing you say that. Think that."

He shook his head, ignoring a remote part of his mind that noted the black car, still behind them.

"You're not a liability, you're our friend. I just…I just want you to feel like you can talk to me. I'm not going to judge you."

She looked at him, taking in his profile, the way his jaw was set, his eyes, the slight frown that etched his brow.

"He made me tell him what happened."

Robin exhaled, grip tightening on the steering wheel.

"All of it?"

She shook her head.

"All of it…every last detail…how many times he stabbed me…what he said…how many broken ribs, how many punches."

He felt his breath catch in his chest and heard hers take on ragged edges. Robin pulled over, partially to see if they really were being followed, and partially so that he could give Raven his full attention.

"Was it awful?"

She tried to smile.

"Nearly destroyed his office."

He raised an eyebrow, propping his feet up on the dashboard.

"But you didn't."

"No, but I cried a lot."

Robin shrugged, trying his hardest to make her comfortable. It seemed to be working; her body language was certainly less defensive.

"Par for the course, probably."

She spoke through breath that was laced with alcohol and ran her hands through her hair.

"Yeah…turns out I was tortured."

It was harder to remain casual at that; Robin felt his hands tighten into fists.

"You didn't know."

She shook her head slowly.

"I guess I did. I just…never called it that."

There was a pause during which he looked at her without pretense. She met his gaze unflinchingly, albeit unsteadily. He reached out to grip her shoulder.

"You going to be okay?"

She lowered her eyes.

"I don't know."

They sat in silence for a few minutes, the only sound the gentle hum of the engine and the occasional rush of a passing car. Eventually, Robin turned the key in the ignition and glanced again at the side mirror.

"You wouldn't have told me any of this if you were sober, would you?"

She smiled ironically.

"Probably not."

He let out a low breath and released his grip on the steering wheel to grasp her hand.

"I'm glad you did."

She returned the pressure.

"I'm…really drunk."

He laughed a little, relieving some of the tension in his chest as he put the car in gear.

"There's water in the glove compartment."

Raven sighed as she reached for the bottle, something in the back of her mind telling her that she would regret not hydrating in the morning. As she unscrewed the cap, several things happened in quick succession. Robin frowned and glanced at the rear view mirror, eyes narrowing, and Raven sensed a spike in his emotional energy. A jolt sent water splashing down her front and pooling in her lap. Robin's hands tightened on the steering wheel. Then something hit them.

The sound was there first, the grating of metal on metal piercing her eardrums like shards of glass. Then came the jolt, time catching up with her at an alarming rate as the violence of their collision with the cliff face sent her head into an airbag. She felt, suddenly, as though her stomach had been left behind somewhere on the highway and her limbs had turned to jello. There was a moment, just a moment of silence during which she remained stunned and Raven became aware of her unharmed body again. Then there was a surge of alarm. _Robin. _

She pushed herself away from the dashboard with sudden violence, and relief that was almost pain rushed through her when she glanced over and saw him cutting away his seatbelt, gritting his teeth in a painful grimace. Severing her own belt with a scissor strike of dark energy, Raven tried to clear her persistently clouded mind. _You just had to drink, didn't you? _

"Robin."

He glanced at her, relief washing briefly over his features.

"I'm okay. Are you – "

Then the roof of the car was ripped off and they were on them, wave after wave of robots, the same kind that had attacked days ago, some boasting gruesome repairs. Hands had been welded back into heads, leaving gaping sockets of wires in their wake. They sparked ominously, and Raven could see an endless sea of metal against the constellation-studded sky.

Reaction time slower than usual, she had to let Robin attack first while she remembered how to move. He leapt onto the roof of the car, staff suddenly extended, and began to cleave a path through the wave of murderous robots. Raven, once she regained control of her faculties, followed him and began to cut them to pieces, struggling with her aim.

"We're…outnumbered…"

Robin grimaced and ducked as something that looked suspiciously like molten metal shot past their heads.

"Any suggestions?"

Normally, she would have had one. She could have teleported, or summoned her shadow self, or, or, or. But she was drunk and it was all she could do to aim properly. Her vision was doing odd things, not quite blurred at the edges, but sharper in some places than others. Futilely, she attempted teleportation, but the distraction of the robots glinting in her periphery was enough to prevent her from accessing the intense focus that was necessary.

"Damnit."

She was forced to take to the air, pulling Robin by the collar as she did so. He alighted on a protruding piece of rock and fought alongside her, sweat dripping from his brow. They just kept coming; for every one that they destroyed, there was another, grimacing, armless, headless, wires protruding like so many needles from their chest cavities.

Raven aimed a rock at one gleaming, metal chest, but missed and barely had time to throw up a shield before the thing had grabbed her by the front of her shirt. She cried out, cursing her dulled reflexes as the thing slammed her against the cliff face.

"Raven!"

He turned towards her, turned his back on one of them, let it grasp his arm. His wrist snapped with a nasty crack. Raven felt an echo of his pain as his face drained of color, then his panic nearly overwhelmed her, combined with her own in a sea of red-tinged emotion as the robot threw him like a rag doll. The one holding her was gripping her hands: she couldn't have cushioned his fall even if she had been in full control of her powers.

He collided with the street.

His pain washed over her, bright red and all-consuming. She felt it, the blood coming to his lips, the limbs snapping.

A cry left her, one that was raw and animal, indicative of her loss of control. The robots around her exploded into masses of sparking wiring. She was at his side in seconds, kneeling on the pavement next to his alarmingly still body. His arms were bent at angles that made her stomach turn. There were times, usually when something was very wrong, when Raven's powers came fluidly, outside of her ability to summon or control them. Now was one of those times; instinct born of desperation was flooding her body. Praying to all the gods she knew, Raven enveloped them both in dark energy.

* * *

Thank you so much for reading, please review, etc. etc.

xxxx


	16. What Happened Last Night

Raven knotted her fingers together and studied the interplay of shadow across her knuckles. Light was touching the edge of the carpet, spilling onto and over the windowsill. The hospital wing was quiet save for the beeping of monitors and her own jagged breathing. The others had come and gone in varying states of shock. Only Cyborg had remained calm, for which Raven had been grateful, given her own frayed nerves. He had told her to go to bed, to which she had responded with a deadly look aimed from her place at Robin's bedside.

Dawn was breaking now, and each blink weighed on her eyelids; sleep threatening her consciousness no matter how hard she tried to push it away. She had been awake all night, and she had no intention of retreating to her bedroom. A sudden change in the rhythmic beeping of Robin's heart monitor made her look up sharply, but it regulated within seconds and she lowered her gaze, feeling tears prickling her corneas. _Please wake up. _A headache was making itself known in her temples, and nausea fought itself in her stomach, products of her excessive drinking the night before. This was her fault, all of it. She didn't look at Robin. He was too still, his face too shadowed, bruises too raw on his cheekbone.

Instead, she looked at the floor.

Robin looked at her.

She occupied am uncomfortable-looking chair just to the left of his bed. Her hair hung lank and unkempt around her face, which was pale and marred by dark circles and a cut on her cheek. Her feet were planted on the carpet, forearms resting on the tops of her knees. Her hands were moving slowly, knotting and unknotting, which was the only betrayal of the tension in her body. He didn't say anything, choosing instead to assess the extent of his injuries as the sun crept into the room and dyed the carpet a warm golden color.

Still, she wouldn't look up, and Robin eventually spoke, voice harsh from disuse and weak with pain.

"How's the hangover?"

Raven's head shot up so quickly it was almost alarming, eyes wide as she looked at him. In an instant, she was at his side, looking at his monitors, one hand at his wrist, checking his pulse. Once she was satisfied he was all right, she sank to her knees by the bed, hand still clasped around his forearm.

"Oh thank god. You…oh god."

He struggled to sit up, and was rewarded with blinding pain in his chest. He waited for it to subside, cringing, then propped himself up on his elbows so that he could look at her. His bed was low, he noticed, as Raven was about level with him, even kneeling. He guessed that she had needed to hover lift him onto it.

"How bad is it?"

She was more expressive than Robin had ever seen her, face taut with worry and eyes clouded with guilt. It shook him; Raven could always be counted on for stoicism, if nothing else.

"I tried to heal you…but…I couldn't…"

She shook her head and pushed her hair roughly behind her ears, clearing her throat.

"You had a lot of broken bones. I didn't have enough energy to deal with everything, so I had to heal the internal injuries first."

He watched her closely, frowning as it occurred to him.

"Raven – how serious was it?"

She cleared her throat again, arms wrapped around herself, hands tight at her elbows. She would not meet his gaze.

"Your heart stopped."

He let out a slow breath, trying not to react in extremes, but she felt his panic anyway and reached out to grip his arm again, pulling herself together enough to give the unflinching report he had been looking for.

"I'm sorry. It's been a long night," she met his gaze again, hands reassuringly steady on his wrist. "You weren't breathing when I got here. I performed CPR. You responded well. Once I got your heart beating, I got you onto the bed. Had to lower it though. You're surprisingly heavy."

A shadow of a smile flickered across her face as Robin rolled his eyes.

"I'll try to lose some weight…make this easier on you."

"Thanks," she said sarcastically.

"You're welcome," he winced as his ribs gave another pang. Everything seemed to be getting worse, maybe the drugs leeching from his system.

"What else?"

There was a pregnant pause during which Raven looked down at her hands, wondering how much to tell him.

"There was a lot of internal bleeding and some swelling in your brain. I had to repair all of that. By the time I did, I was too tired to deal with the rest of it. I raised the alarm. Cyborg gave you some morphine but – " Her gaze sharpened as she felt pain pushing out at her, an echo of the redness she had seen the night before. She stood abruptly. Robin felt something probe briefly at his mind as she glanced at the monitors. "Where does it hurt?"

Everywhere was the answer to that, but Robin, alarmed at her worry and her obvious exhaustion, tugged at her arm until she sat down again.

"It's not that bad."

She shot him one of her deadpan looks.

"Now is not the time to be macho, Robin."

He gave a laugh that was more of a wheeze and tilted his head back against the pillows.

"Everywhere, but you don't…I don't want you to overexert yourself."

She scowled at that, and he heard her mutter something about this being her fault in the first place before she gripped his arm more tightly with one hand and placed the other over his chest, shutting her eyes. Robin felt an almost immediate cessation of pain as his ribs knit themselves back together, and sighed with relief as her hand moved over his wrist, then his legs. When she opened her eyes, she was visibly paler.

"Better?"

He pushed himself up, leaning back against the headboard so that he could look at her properly.

"Much, thanks."

She shook her head.

"Don't thank me. This was my fault."

Robin gave her a sharp look. There was anguish he was not used to seeing on her face.

"You know better than that."

He winced as he shifted the wrong way and pain lanced up his half-healed leg.

"People attack at the wrong time. That doesn't make it our fault."

Raven let out a shaky breath and put both her hands over his.

"You're right. I just…you scared me there for a second."

A smile tugged at his lips.

"You never answered my question."

She looked at him, confusion written on her face.

"How's the hangover?"

A choked laugh escaped her lips at that.

"Brutal."

From the doorway, Cyborg's voice sounded, amusement evident in his tone.

"I'll bet. You look like crap."

Raven shot him a dirty look.

"Thanks."

He raised his hands in mock surrender as he crossed the room to look through Robin's vitals.

"I tell it like it is. You really gotta get some sleep."

He punched some numbers into his arm, causing it to fold back on itself and reveal a frankly alarming needle. Raven glared at him.

"I'm not leaving."

Cyborg flicked the tip of the syringe as his arm closed back up, choosing to look at the IV bag rather than Raven.

"All right, suit yourself. Pass out. But don't come cryin' to me when Beast Boy draws penises all over your face."

Raven maintained her glare for a minute, then sighed and turned her gaze on Robin, who was grinning tiredly at their exchange.

"Are you all right now?"

Her concern was unusual – and Robin didn't like to admit it, but also somewhat warming. She cared, enough that she had stayed up all night at his bedside.

"I'm fine."

When she hovered for another minute, eyes flickering nervously from Robin's vital signs to his face, Cyborg rolled his eyes.

"He'll be out cold in a second, I'm about to give him enough morphine to knock out a horse."

A final squeeze of his hand, and she was gone, pulling the sleeves of her hoodie down over her hands as she headed for the door, where she paused and glanced back at him.

"You'll let me know if you need healing, right?"

Cyborg, having plunged the syringe into the IV bag, gave her an exasperated look.

"If you don't get to bed this minute, you're going to be the one who needs healing."

She lifted her hands to chest height and backed into the hallway.

"Fine. Going."

Robin watched her walk away, feeling a strange mixture of gratitude, pain, and something else in his chest. Cyborg gave him a knowing look.

"Someone's got a crush."

Robin gave him a dirty look, resenting, suddenly, his inability to fight or stalk out of the room.

"Oh shut up."

* * *

Her room was as she'd left it, comforting and quiet. She'd done some redecorating since Trigon's defeat, but the mood of the space hadn't changed much. She had traded her dark grey walls for softer off-white ones, and her curtains were now open most of the time, allowing the sun entry, though she was careful to protect her books from its rays. Where her dresser had used to be, she had hung several plants from the ceiling; ferns and mosses mostly, but also a few creeping vines that bloomed in the sun. They were useful for a great deal of her witchcraft and their scents helped with meditation. Her bookshelves, she had simply pushed out of the way of the window. She had also replaced her carpet and, in a very recent move, purchased a low mahogany table that sat in the center of several cushions. She was, slowly but surely, building a collection of worry stones, and the table housed a bowl of them. Her favorites were at her bedside.

Now, when she walked in, eyes aching with tiredness, the sun felt again like an assault. She crossed the room and twitched the curtains closed, leaving the space considerably dimmer, but still infused with light by virtue of the candles she had perched in odd places. She fell rather than climbed onto her bed, and was asleep the moment her head hit the pillow.

* * *

I mean...I was never going to kill anyone.

Thank you so much for reading + reviews are always helpful!

xxx


	17. The Mall of Shopping

Her room was as she'd left it, comforting and quiet. She'd done some redecorating since Trigon's defeat, but the mood of the space hadn't changed much. She had traded her dark grey walls for softer off-white ones, and her curtains were now open most of the time, allowing the sun entry, though she was careful to protect her books from its rays. Where her dresser had used to be, she had hung several plants from the ceiling; ferns and mosses mostly, but also a few creeping vines that bloomed in the sun. They were useful for a great deal of her witchcraft and their scents helped with meditation. Her bookshelves, she had simply pushed out of the way of the window. She had also replaced her carpet and, in a very recent move, purchased a low mahogany table that sat in the center of several cushions. She was, slowly but surely, building a collection of worry stones, and the table housed a bowl of them. Her favorites were at her bedside.

Now, when she walked in, eyes aching with tiredness, the sun felt again like an assault. She crossed the room and twitched the curtains closed, leaving the space considerably dimmer, but still infused with light by virtue of the candles she had perched in odd places. She fell rather than climbed onto her bed, and was asleep the moment her head hit the pillow.

It was a knock that woke her just after noon. Immediately worried that something had happened to Robin, she flew at that door, and was relieved to find Starfire there with a cup of steaming tea in her hands. She relaxed, lowered her eyelids, and looked questioningly at the alien, who was far harder to intimidate than Beast Boy or Cyborg.

"I have come to make sure you are the all right, and to bring you this."

She offered the mug, which Raven accepted, opening her door slightly wider to allow access to her bedroom.

"Thanks, Star."

Starfire nodded and tucked a strand of auburn hair behind her ear as she followed Raven into the room, emotions coloring with surprise and pleasure at the invitation.

"You are most welcome. I have just been to visit Robin."

Raven felt ice clutch at her stomach as she led the way to the center of the room, settling cross-legged on her favorite cushion. She tried and failed to hide her worry; it colored her voice, which cracked around the edges.

"Is he…"

Starfire was looking at her a little too gently, and with a little too much understanding.

"According to Cyborg, he will be fine as long as he gets plenty of the rest. His vital signs are good. You need not worry."

Raven dropped her gaze, watching steam curl into the air from her tea. Her relief at Robin's condition was surprisingly hollow, tainted by the guilt that was eating through her stomach. Starfire sipped her own mug of what Raven could only guess was the strange, Tamaranian hot chocolate she had sampled once. It had made her incredibly nauseous before her demon side had taken over and healed her damaged stomach lining.

"What is it that troubles you, friend? Robin will be fine."

Her voice was gentle and lilting, her accent brushing its edges with concern as she leaned forward. Raven sighed with frustration and ran her hands over her forehead.

"It was my fault, Star."

It was a mark of how much Starfire had matured that she did not gasp or otherwise react, merely set her own mug down on the table and moved closer.

"I very much doubt this is the case."

The faith and loyalty in her voice made Raven want to cry, but she'd done more than enough of that lately.

"I was drunk. Robin came to pick me up, and I was drunk. We could have taken them if I hadn't been…"

Starfire, suddenly efficient, forced the tea back into Raven's hands.

"Drink this. I understand that humans sometimes need help overcoming the…hanged overs."

Raven, slightly amused in spite of herself, took an obedient sip as Starfire stood and began to rifle through her drawers.

"Would you rather Robin not have come and gotten you and perished yourself?"

"I…well, no, but…"

"And do you not think that it was your own wit quickedness that saved him from death? Do you not think that it was your healing that has made him sure to be functional tomorrow?"

She finished her exploration and turned back towards Raven, holding clothes in her hands. Raven, too preoccupied to stop her, put down her now-empty mug.

"I just feel like I've been nothing but trouble lately."

Starfire nodded understandingly as she pulled a towel out of Raven's dresser and hunted until she found shampoo and conditioner.

"I felt much the same when Blackfire was here, and also when I first joined you friends. This feeling is not bad, but you must know that it is not the fault of anyone, only the evil people who seek to do us harm."

Raven, having previously been too busy digesting Starfire's surprisingly good advice, frowned slightly as she looked at the clothes and toiletries now spread out on her bed.

"Um…Star? What are you doing?"

Starfire, still uncharacteristically brisk, took Raven's arm in one hand and lifted her easily, ignoring the half-articulated protests that resulted.

"We must go shopping!"

Raven groaned.

"Star, I really don't think – "

"You must leave this room and this tower."

"But – "

"Besides, you are to attend a formal dinner very soon, and your wardrobe is not equipped."

She set Raven down just outside of the bathroom and shoved clothes, towel, and bottles into her arms.

"You are covered in blood and robot scraps. Cleanse yourself. You will feel better. Then we will go."

Had Raven been anything other than exhausted, she would have protested, or, more likely, not have even let her friend into her room in the first place. But as much as she hated shopping, Star was right. She needed to experience some version of world that wasn't steeped in her problems.

"Um…yeah. Thank you, Starfire."

When she emerged from the bathroom, hair still damp and skin refreshingly devoid of Robin's blood, it was to find Starfire gone and her room tidied. After a brief detour to put her towel in a laundry basket and heal a few wounds she hadn't noticed until they had hissed, livid, on her skin in the shower, she tracked Starfire's emotional signature to the kitchen. She looked up and smiled, tucking her long, reddish hair behind an ear.

"Are you ready for our shopping?"

Raven sighed and bit back a sarcastic comment.

"As ready as I'll ever be."

Cyborg and Beast Boy, engrossed in video games on the couch, both snickered loudly. Raven glared at them until they returned to their idiotic activity with unnaturally sober expressions.

"Try this one on your body."

Raven sighed. For the umpteenth time, Starfire had dragged her out of the bookstore and she now occupied one of two changing rooms in a small-ish mall version of a boutique. For the life of her, she couldn't see what Starfire was so excited about. Malls were evil places, distillations of everything she had ever read about capitalism. They were also surprisingly like what Raven had seen of supervillains: she was pretty sure Mad Mod had co-opted the idea of using the smell of baked goods to lure people into his lair from the Cinnabon stores around every corner. She looked doubtfully at the latest dress. She didn't like dresses; they fit awkwardly on her body and her way of standing – hips forward, feet apart, arms crossed over her chest – just didn't work with things that were as frilly as this one.

"I don't know, Star…"

To her surprise, Starfire didn't disagree. When she opened the door to reveal the result (the dress was a kind of pale yellow and cinched just at her ribcage), the alien frowned.

"You are right. It is not…you."

Raven groaned.

"This is a waste of time. Why can't I just wear jeans and be done with it?"

It was Starfire's turn to groan.

"I know we are neither of us of this earth, but you know shockingly little about this planet's aristocrats."

Raven raised an eyebrow as she shut the door and yanked the dress off with perhaps more violence than was necessary.

"Enlighten me."

She heard Starfire sigh.

"This type of social event requires dress that is "the classy". You must be attractive only because you look untouchable. It, to my understanding, means not the same thing as pretty or sexy."

Raven was reluctantly impressed. Starfire had made a lot of mistakes with earthly culture, but because of the planet's similarities to Azarath, Raven hadn't had nearly as much trouble. She also hadn't had to learn nearly as much. Starfire consumed culture like a sponge. She was also extremely intuitive, something that people often missed. Raven, by contrast, could pick up on emotion, but thought of most social interaction as superfluous, and therefore missed a lot of the things Starfire took great pains to acknowledge.

When they finally made their way out of the store, Star was carrying a large shopping bag (she somehow managed to make everything she wore look effortless) and Raven was carrying the vestiges of her hangover.

"I don't know if I'm cut out for this. Maybe you should go."

"Nonsense. You are just as much of the cut out as I. Besides, I have the dating to do, and I do not wish to depart to Gotham before I must."

Raven sensed something akin to fluttering in her emotions.

"Dating, huh?"

Starfire shrugged, hair rippling fluidly down her back. Raven wasn't fooled by her nonchalance.

"How's Argent?"

She didn't need to probe any longer – Starfire was blushing, face almost as red as her hair.

"She is well."

Raven smiled to herself, waiting. Star wasn't the type to keep things to herself, but she was usually pretty quiet about relationships. She didn't like to talk to them around the rest of the team, particularly Beast Boy, who she knew would tease incessantly.

"She sends her regards."

Raven nodded, tired smile still hovering around her lips.

"Likewise." There was a pause. "And you two?"

Star stopped outside yet another store and pulled Raven inside.

"Toni is…magic. I have not met another human like her."

Raven looked doubtfully at some sort of pink thing.

"She's not entirely human."

Star shoved a long black gown at her.

"Only half. You do not believe this is important though, surely?"

Raven's smile was not without irony.

"Half-demon, Star. I'm hardly one to talk."

Starfire's thousand-kilowatt smile was back.

"You like her, yes?"

Raven summoned her hazy memories of the small, pixie-like girl. They had met a few times when the Brotherhood of Evil had been a real threat. Argent was an honorary titan, but by that point there had been so many of them that Raven had begun to have trouble keeping track. She had been cool, though. Raven remembered appreciating the neon-red she seemed to favor for hair color.

"She seems great."

"Oh good! You must re-meet her! Everyone must. She has been shy, but I believe she would get along with you all very well."

Raven sighed as she pushed aside something floor-length and nearly transparent.

"Maybe she has some fashion advice."

Starfire giggled.

"She says that she sometimes prefers to cut up men's clothing as it is simpler and – "

Her green eyes widened suddenly.

"I have an idea."

The store they ended up at was…expensive. That was really the only word for it; every piece of clothing there was black, which Raven appreciated, and tailored, which she did not. They were greeted, eventually, by a stodgy looking sailsperson in a black suit.

"Can I help you, ladies? Perhaps you are looking for a gift?"

Raven looked from him to Starfire, nonplussed. She, on the other hand, had thrown her bags onto a low sofa and was holding a suit at arm's length, looking critically at its cut.

"Not a gift, no. You will find something to fit her, please!"

The man looked Raven up and down, expression somewhat insulting.

"Hmmm…she's not exactly tall, is she?"

Starfire, who was easily four inches taller than Raven, stood next to him, frowning.

"Pants can be altered, yes?"

They continued to prattle about inseams while the salesman pulled a measuring tape apparently from thin air and began to measure everything from her arms to her torso. By this time, Raven was fairly sure steam was coming out of her ears. She glowered until they had finished, both apparently oblivious to her annoyance. Eventually, she found herself in yet another changing room, looking at herself in a mirror that was far too large. Starfire's voice was cheerful outside the velvet curtain that cut off her little carpeted room.

"How goes it?"

Raven looked at herself. She looked…professional. Like she could run a multimillion dollar company or work as an assassin and nobody would know the difference. The suit had been pulled from the 'petite' section of the store, and fit her surprisingly well. The jacket was slightly big in the shoulders, it was true, but it cinched at the waist and buttoned up not-quite far enough to entirely hide her chest, which looked fantastic given that she wore nothing under the jacket but a black bra. Her pants were only slightly too long, but they also fit her waist perfectly and hung almost gracefully, skimming her hips and smoothing her silhouette.

"Actually…I kind of like it."

Starfire entered through the curtain and promptly gasped.

"Friend Raven! This is perfect! You are…badass, I believe is the word, yes?"

Raven smiled, watching her reflection do the same.

"Yeah. That's the word. Thanks, Star."

She wasn't overly fond of hugs, but somehow, she didn't mind when the alien wrapped her arms around her shoulders and grinned at her in the mirror.

* * *

in my head Starfire has always been gay. #mystorymyrules

thank you for reading!

xxx


End file.
